Double chocolate Magnum.
Saying ‘double treble, treble treble’ 100 times.
Having auld friends called Elspeth.
Days out instead of nights out.
The chippie in Inverkeithing (voted by the people)
Walking into work and shouting: ‘it’s maself!!’
Three Star Bars £1 at Tesco or Three Boosts £1.
Singing ‘Dungo’ instead of ‘Bimbo’ by Jim Reeves down the pub with yer buddy’s.
Doing the Grand Ole Duke of York with Elspeth.
Smashing fellas – all time greats.
The marvellous Paul Kealy
Pickle Jar Heroes!
The idea of George Clooney as US President.
Benny Hill themed bars.
Harry Lauder great man – great life.
Sofia Carson dedicating an In’s and Outs song for myself and David.
Having a morning feud.
Beard Gardens instead of Beer Gardens (you only get in with a beard)
Cutting off bits of tyre and serving them up as Steak Dianne.
The comment: ‘I’m going on my Hollibobs’
Teeth sucking mechanics.
Return of the: ‘I’m not a racist but …’ comment.
Jobs worths at the recycle joint: ‘cannae put that in there’ attitude ae life.
Killjoy swimming pool attendants, jobs worth.
Folk saying ‘Whoop Whoop!’
Again, the price of a chippie.
Mutants on marching season.
Tommy Robinson and his merry followers.
Far right two-bob cretins.
Acquiring a whiskey nose after a day on the beer!
Socks for fish.
Being a Robert Killjoy.
The quote: ‘if I was 30 years younger’
Boy racer types, elbow out window, shitty shades, SnapBack cap, chewing Wrigley’s.
Lassie’s giving blowies for beak!
Blokes that would hump the barbers floor!
Thats all folks and remember, it’s only a lark.