Cameron Diaz for Sunday Beer Fear.
Pinky out Espresso drinking.
Day’s out not Nights out!
Priya Sharma from Emmerdale.
Four f*ckin chunky kit-kats £1 Asda!
Speaking through your nose on a conference call.
Baking a can of strongbow and calling it Sunday roast.
Mistaking baldy people for each other.
Tripping up Fascists.
Tripping up men with man buns.
Winning the pottery.
The arrival of mint flakes!
Lady’s with thigh tattoos (again)
People asking for In’s and Out’s.
Andrew Wevvers Weatherall.
Adults chanting ‘oggy oggy oggy … oi oi oi’ when the plane lands in Turkey.
Thinking yer ten years younger than folk, but you’re ten years older.
Totties instead of Tatties (Fife twang) Loddie instead of Laddie (Fife twang)
Lassies saying ‘cheers now’ after blowies for beak.
30p for the f*ckin toilet at a train station.
Yer nephews cutting cucumbers with their chins.
Capitalist Cold Callers: ‘remember the accident you were in’
Last train whoppers.
Last Bus Whoppers
Man Buns (again)
The Barbers floor mob!
Folk moaning about the hot weather!
The trendy concept of ‘street food’
Judges on Food Reality shows.
Domino Pizza leaflet through the door once a week.
FB Snides throwing out fishing bait to attract wrong un’s.
Photo Booths at Weddings.
SDL members with teeth like a fruit loaf!
Wee black-mutt visits when the weather changes.
People saying ‘so I got them told…’ when they told them fuck-all
The comment ‘I’m going on my hollibibs’
Thats yer lot and remember it’s only a lark. Switch everything off at night, mirror signal manoeuvre and off ye go.