Holywell Street

Celtic, Music and Subculture for lads and lassies

Tag: writing

  • Jimmy Whelan talks to Holywell Street

    Jimmy Whelan talks to Holywell Street

    HWS recently had the pleasure of conducting an in-depth Q&A with Jimmy Whelan—an interview we had longed to arrange for quite some time. Jimmy is not only a talented author and poet but also a figure in the community of Blantyre. His influence extends to the renowned Blantyre Soccer Academy, where he, as chairman, has made significant contributions to nurturing young talent. I highly regard Jimmy as a true friend and mentor and admire his deep passion as a Celtic supporter. His latest publication, *From Penury to Solatium*, is a fascinating collection of his life stories—filled with moments of joy, laughter and adversity. Lately, he has been involved in creating a new football ground in Blantyre, which includes newly built changing rooms and an entirely new community hall. This large project has transformed the community of Blantyre significantly. We met in McCHuills Bar on High Street as we normally do.

    Great to see you mate, how’s things? You are a busy man …

    Aye, hunky-dory, can’t complain and yes I am a very busy man!

    I wanted to kick off with the new Blantyre football ground project you have been putting together. What is the latest?

    Well, we have now completed our first phase which is the Community Hall which we are giving back to the Community but we have spent in the region of £200,000 reinventing it. We are now in phase two side of it where we have the new changing facilities going in and the third phase is the actual football pitch which we are desperately seeking funding for just now. So, everything is happening all around it, it is just getting the pitch up and running by this time next year. We need in the region of £800,000 to do that. I have been funded in the past for the Blantrye Soccer Hub and now we require funding for a new football pitch and car park (please see Link below).

    The Blantyre Project link

    I’ve read many of your poems over the years. When did you start writing them?

    I started writing my poems around 2009 as a pastime. At the time, I was simply jotting down my thoughts and reading a lot of poetry. I particularly enjoyed the works of Robert Burns because my granddad was a fan of his poetry, as well as the poems of Robert Service. I wrote about my life and my family experiences, and over time, my writing became deeper. I believe my poetry has evolved since then. In 2011, along with Thomas Slaven and Francis Devine, I helped compile a poetry book titled Changing Places that was funded by the people of Blantyre. The books were sold for £10 each, and we raised approximately £15,000, which was donated to the Reamonn Gormley – Good Child Foundation.

    Your genre has moved from poetry to prose and non-fiction. Your new book, “From Penury to Solatium”, appears to recount your life events, filled with many stories to share. I assume the inspiration comes from your colourful past?

    Yes, believe it or not, the book actually originated from a conversation I had with my brother. We were driving back from a funeral in England, and my brother—who didn’t know much about my life in London and the various adventures my other brother and I had—was quite mesmerised by our stories, including the trouble we had gotten into. He suggested that I should write about it, and that’s exactly what I decided to do. I traced my writing back to my childhood and continued through to the present, including details about all my projects, such as “Keep the Heid,” which is a group we established for men’s emotional well-being. Aye and this is very true with writers, artists and musicians where ideas just fall from the sky at certain times … Yeah, and the book will make you laugh, it will make you cry and it has some heartfelt moments in there from me. It takes you through my addictions and how I recovered or I am in recovery from my addiction right up to this present day. Aye and you get that a lot when people go into recovery from their addictions they become very creative. Yeah, you need to be constantly working on yourself! A good friend of mine once said to me: ” If yer in the hoose yourself yer in the hoose wi and idiot” [laughter] he didn’t use those exact words but the quote has always stuck with me. That is not meaning being alone as such but it means keeping active and creative. For example I have been involved in the football project for over 15 years – as I am a founding member of the Blantyre Soccer Academy. I could probably commit around 40 hours a week to that, but I don’t, because I have delegated much of the work I used to do to three full-time staff members.

    As you know, I have visited the Blantyre Soccer Academy Hub. I found it to be a social and therapeutic place. How did the Hub come to be?

    Well what happened was, the way the club was formed was as a football club first and foremost but I was more interested in the Community of Blantyre. The town was actually the murder capital of Scotland at the time. The gang culture in our small town of 17,000 people was just out of hand, there was people getting stabbed everywhere. So, when we formed this, it was the community I was more involved in. To try and get the kids together and also the parents speaking, you know, and that’s what happened. On the Friday night we had an open night training and the kids would all come down and everyone would have on their training tops and then it was a form of cohesion with the kids and the parents and they would actually start speaking. So everywhere you went you would see Blantyre Soccer Academy. So, then we got that big, we needed somewhere we could call our own.  From there, I approached the Council and through the community asset transfer, we bought Blantyre Soccer Academy Community Hub, which was an old drop-in centre initially for pensioners. From there we totally transformed and totally renovated it. We bought it from the Council for £1. We basically changed it into a working area, and we have three full-time members of staff who work out of there. We have a full community garden at the back with a COVID memorial garden where people can reflect. There are allotments opposite it, which are excellent for the community. It did take me a three-year battle with the Council to get this in place.

    The Council was fully aware of the issues in Blantyre and the gang culture; you could see evidence of it everywhere, with spray-paint messages like “High Tyre, Low Tyre” scattered around. Tragically, young Reamonn was murdered outside the Parkville Hotel after a Celtic versus Aberdeen game. It was not a football-related incident but rather the consequence of a robbery that went wrong. In remembrance, we now hold an annual event called the Reamonn Gormley Festival, which includes a Sportsman’s Dinner. The festival attracts football teams from all over Scotland, England, and Ireland, and I believe it is the second largest festival in Scotland. Our club is ranked third among grassroots clubs, with Aberdeen taking first place. For a small town like Blantyre, we’re doing quite well in the rankings.

    Photo By Derek Monaghan

    So, it’s time to share—what are your favourite clothing brands? I know we both dig Gabbici.

    Well, right now, Gabicci is probably my favourite. The reason for that is I was very inclined to go with John Smedley for many years, and I still have a few Smedleys in the house, which I bought when I was 18. The quality of a John Smedley these days has gone very much downhill. So, once I started buy Gabicci I decided that is the new brand for me. What I love about it is, the quality and a very decent price. They are also bringing back a lot of the original stuff with the long colour which Smedley used to do.

    Moving on, the other brand is Armani, although it can be a bit a tight fit. I’m not getting much slimmer, as they might say, and Armani tends to be a tight fit for those Italians who are built like a pencil. But I have always liked their stuff especially the trousers the original stuff with the eagle logo. These days I have started dressing more casual, I was never a casual person and I believe that’s because I was brought up with the early Mod and Ska scene.

    This part of town at Trongate was always a popular shopping and  brands and prices didn’t really matter. What was important was the colour of your Sta-Press, Harrington, or Fred Perry. By the time I reached 16 or 17, I looked at my peers, especially my two brothers, who always dressed smartly, and wondered where they got their clothes. I remember Trongate being popular for shopping around 1980-83. There were shops like Jack the Lad, Chelsea Boy, and, of course, Dees. It was the era of ‘posers,’ and Charlie Nicholas was seen as the love God. Dees was definitely the go-to place for getting your sta-press, and I love that the shop has remained largely the same over the years. They still sell those cool scarves, including the Paisley ones that I like. Another place nearby was ‘Crazy House,’ which had about five floors and those mad mirrors as you walked in.

    Every Saturday, my mates and I, who were around 15 or 16 years old, would hang out in Trongate. After that, we would stroll up to Queen Street and go to ‘Fixx’ or another spot. We’d also check out a second-hand shop on Queen Street called ‘Flip’, which had some fantastic finds. We often sat downstairs in ‘Fixx’; even though we were underage, they would let us in, and we’d just drink cans of Red Stripe. The Rock Garden was right across the street, but we couldn’t get in there because of the bouncer at the door.

    Photo By Derek Monaghan McCHuills Bar Glasgow

    Eventually I started shopping in Lesley G which was just as you came out of Central Station. They brought in lot of Italian imports and they used to use a tailor which was on Renfield Street called ‘Skint’ the shop would maybe send round six pairs of trousers and they would get altered and fitted. So, we then decided to cut out Lesley G and go straight to the tailor and get our gear done there. Sounds like proper detail went into this? Oh, aye definitely, we used to dictate what we wanted, if it was five pleats or three and it could be very unique. It’s quite cool and Jim Cameron and Gadger talked about the same type of thing with the tailors as well.

    I still have my wedding suit made by Skint, and it hangs up in my wardrobe. I know it will never fit me again. It’s a wool suit, one of those from Talking Heads with the shoulder pads! When I got married, it was 120 degrees on the beach, and I was wearing this wool suit. But I looked good [laughter]. During my time in London, I enjoyed exploring places like Kensington Market and Camden, where you could find a mix of high-end items and unique pieces. The prices were decent, too. Camden was the go-to place for leather jackets. I loved my six years in London; we always knew where to find the things we wanted. I’ll never understand why I moved back.

    There’s a picture in the book of me wearing espadrilles, believe it or not, I’m sitting on the steps without socks, embracing that pure Charlie Nicholas style we mentioned, complete with Gatsby pants that have pleats. I mean, those shoes would only last one night since the soles would wear out quickly. I remember Charlie Nicholas showing up at Parkhead looking like that and getting fined by the club for not wearing socks! [laughter] I also recall seeing Charlie at a U2 concert at Tiffany’s at the end of Sauchiehall Street. He was standing right behind me when he became the Celtic idol; he always had the coolest wedge haircut. In fact, I saw both Simple Minds and U2 in the same week at Tiffany’s..

    I was really into the second-generation Mod scene because they always looked dapper; they never appeared scruffy. I didn’t start wearing jeans until about seven years ago, and I’m not sure if it was the colour that held me back, but I always preferred chinos. When Lois reintroduced corduroys, I was pleased, especially since they revamped the fit to make them less tight. When Paul Malloy hosts his Mod nights here, you can just look around and see those original Mod styles everywhere.

    And your favourite musical influences are …

    Well, I would have to go with David Bowie, and that was probably since the age of about seven years old. I mean, this guy changed his genre so many times over the space of 50 years, and it worked for him every time. He was the first guy to have the wedge haircut, as seen on the front of the Low album. All the way from the laughing Gnome, that was the first song of his that I had heard, and I think because I was so young, I really took to that. My older brother was heavily into Bowie as well. I just took on from there, from Spiders to Station to Station, Aladdin Sane, Low and right through to Black Star.

    That last album, “Blackstar,” was so clever, filled with hidden messages that I really appreciated. I liked how cryptic his lyrics were concerning everything he did. For instance, in the video for his single “Lazarus,” he retreats backwards into a wardrobe before shutting the door.

    Then there’s Mick Ronson, who played with Bowie during the Spiders from Mars era. No one really knows why Ronson was let go. He moved on to work on his solo projects, which unfortunately flopped, and Bowie never brought him back into the fold.

    I actually enjoy a lot of his later dance music, like “Let’s Dance.” In the past, I would have dismissed it because I was so focused on his early work, such as “Ziggy Stardust” and “Diamond Dogs.” However, I’ve come to appreciate Bowie as the true genius he was. I love him also because he never sold out; he didn’t sell his rights until the very end.

    Bowie is my favourite artist, and I would say my second favourite is Shane MacGowan. He is phenomenal and truly a poet; his lyrics are genius, I love lyrics, as I tend to think a lot about the meaning of a song. MacGowan is incredibly talented, and much of his work revolves around pubs and drinking. You mentioned earlier how some people’s creativity can flourish with sobriety, but in the case of MacGowan, much like Brendan Behan, his creativity came through alcohol.

    I was reading the book by Shane MacGowan’s girlfriend, and she mentioned that she would often find crumpled bits of paper with lyrics written on them beside a bottle of whisky in the morning. She would pick up these scraps of paper, and then two days later, a song would be created. Only he knew what he was thinking. I put him up there in the same bracket as Behan. Although Behan was never a singer but what a talent! My love for Irish music is phenomenal, and I don’t know if that was because I was brought up with it or because my Dad was Irish. They call it the land of saints and scholars. They bring their songs and their stories, and everything is deep. I was brought up with Father Sydney MacEwan and Joseph Locke. My Dad would put that on on a Sunday morning with a bit of rebellion on it.

    Another singer I would like to throw into the mix, and you might be surprised, is Justin Currie from Del Amitri. A lot of my pals were also quite surprised, but I say, have you ever really listened to the lyrics of his songs? Not just like ‘Nothing Ever Happens’ and things like that. Listen to some of his songs, and it’s all about heartbreak or how good he was doing, or this happened, but you just hear the music. He’s still touring, and he does stuff himself.

    Justin Currie was going aboot the same time as Aztec Camera and the likes, but Roddy Frame, for me was a pop star. Then there’s Love & Money, and I believe James Grant himself on Love & Money is the talent. I like James as a person and songwriter, but he didn’t get enough credit for what he did with his first band, Friends Again. James wrote a lot of their stuff, but didn’t get the credit for it; he was a bass player. James wanted to be more, so he went out and formed Love & Money. But Roddy Frame made it; he went to America, from Westwood to Hollywood. Orange Juice were another Scottish band I liked. I thought Edwyn Collins was absolutely brilliant. I saw him just after his stroke, it was a gig with a few Scottish bands – The Bluebells also played, and Roddy Frame made an appearance.

    Regarding our beloved football club, how are you feeling about Celtic right now?

    Under Brendan Rodgers, I believe we are moving in the right direction, and we are managing our finances with great diligence. He has spent a lot of money on a couple of players that a lot of people might not agree wi, but I think he’s looking to take us another step forward next season in Europe. I mean, we have good funds, but the club aren’t going to be frugal. Things need to be done properly.

    Can you recall your first Celtic match?

    Yes, well, I can recall one of my first Celtic matches. I was nine years old, and it was 1976. I went to the Jimmy Johnstone and Bobby Lennox testimonial against Manchester United. Celtic won 4-0 on the night. Jimmy Johnstone threw his boots into the jungle.

    That was my first recollection of attending a game, and I was taken by my brother and my cousin. That night, I also bought a Manchester United scarf. I was drawn to the team because of Tommy Docherty, who was the manager at the time, and Lou Macari, who had also moved there. The previous season, Manchester United had been relegated to the old second division, but now they were back in the first division

    From then on, I was there at Celtic matches whenever I could. So, by the time I was 10 years old, I was actually going by myself. My dad would take me down to John Fallon’s pub, we would have to stand outside, then the supporters bus would come along, my Dad would come out and give me 50 pence and send me onto the bus and tell me not to tell my mum that he had sent me to the match yersel. All the boys were on the bus anyway, I would get a lift over the turnstiles, then come back and get my dad at the pub who pissed and we would go home and tell my mum we had been at the match [laughter]. But that went on with a lot of us. I wasnae caring because I was getting to the game. I actually wrote a poem about it and Big Fallon’s pub.

    As time progressed I had my season ticket and I have basically had that for 32 years. Even when I was in London where I was there from 1987 to 1993. I would come home every two weeks to go come up for the matches. We formed a Celtic Supporters Club down in London which was the Kent CSC. We travelled up for most home games even midweek ones.

    We came up when Celtic played Cologne for a Wednesday night european tie. The fortnight before we played Cologne in the away tie and I disappeared from work and jumped the train to go there.

    Did you follow a team down there?

    Aye, well, I lived about two miles from Selhurst Park, which is home to Crystal Palace so I went there. I had a couple of friends in the in London: one was a Manchester United fan, and the other supported Spurs. So, I followed Spurs down there, I enjoyed going to White Hart Lane and loved the area.

    And the best Celtic player of all time is?

    Well, in my time, it’s got to be Henrik Larsson, I’ve not seen anyone like him. Then I would go for Paul McStay and, in recent times, I would say Callum McGregor. I must also mention Tom Boyd, he was a good servant to Celtic, I got on quite well with Boydy, and of course, he stopped 10 in a row, he’s a legend in my eyes.

    Returning to McStay, he had the chance to leave Celtic many times, but he stayed with us. McGregor is like a linchpin; you can see what happens when he is not in the team.

    How’s life and health for Jimmy Whelan these days?

    Aye, everything’s fine. My health has been good in the last six months. As you know, I have diabetes, and I was diagnosed with that just before I stopped drinking, and it was really taking its toll on me, but thankfully, with the medication these days, it’s good. I go for a liver check every three months, and it is repairing itself all the time. It will never be 100%, but it is a lot better than it was four years ago. I have reigned things in and reflected on my life. Did I enjoy my life? Yes, totally, I thoroughly enjoyed it. My only regret in life was watching my brother die.  I couldn’t get him off the booze. He had to do it himself, and that was the sad thing.

    How have your meetings been going, and how are you feeling about your sobriety?

    I’m doing great! I attend two or three meetings a week, and I really enjoy them because it’s a good way to offload. I recently went on holiday, where I took long walks while the people I was with drank most days. People have stopped asking me why I’m not drinking now; I would sometimes respond with, “What’s it got ae dae wi you?” When I wrote this book and shared my truth at the end, I received a lot of messages from people expressing their disbelief at my honesty. For me, being open about my experiences is important. If I hadn’t gone through what I did, I wouldn’t be where I am today. If I can help someone with this book, that’s even better. There may be someone who thinks, “If he can do it, I can too.” My story could serve as someone else’s survival guide.

    Thanks for talking to us mate.

    My pleasure,

    Many thanks to Jimmy, Derek Monaghan for his input and photography and Nick Stewart at McCHuills as always.

    Penury to Solatium can be purchased here at Amazon: FROM PENURY TO SOLATIUM: Amazon.co.uk: Whelan, J J: 9798319146625: Books

  • Gary ‘Gadger’ Strachan chats to Holywell Street

    Gary ‘Gadger’ Strachan chats to Holywell Street

    HWS embarked on a wee tour to Dundee, known as the City of Discovery, to visit our friend Gary ‘Gadger’ Strachan. He is an intriguing individual with a colourful past and a genuinely cool demeanour. I consider Gadger as a true friend. His stories span from the terraces of the ’70s and the gang culture of Dundee to his upbringing in Lochee. A devoted Celtic supporter and season ticket holder, we delve into his community work, including managing a Junior Football team. Now, he proudly watches his grandson achieve remarkable success as a Scottish champion and international boxer. HWS is pleased to have finally tracked him down for a Q&A session. We met up in the Sleeperz Hotel above Dundee train station.

    Good to see you mate, how are you?

    I’m good mate thanks.

    I wanted to discuss Lochee and what it was like growing up there. I see the Lochee Fleet had a reunion in 2011?

    Growing up in Lochee was a great experience and a valuable education. The Lochee Fleet held a reunion on May 28th that year, which was truly unbelievable. There must have been over a thousand members of that gang throughout its 40-year history, some of the guys had played for Lochee United over the years. We established a cut-off point for the invitations. I was one of the organisers for the night. You had to be 50 years old on the night; there were about 100 invites sent out, and 72 guys rocked up. To this day, I believe it was a mistake because too many good guys didn’t get to attend. It was a ticket only event, which meant the younger lot like young Gadger didn’t get to it.

    So we hired a nightclub in Dundee, and we got down there in the morning and put out a lot of Fleet memorabilia, including paper clippings, photos from the ’70s with names of guys and even a Fleet jumper up on the wall. Ironically, our gang colours were blue and red. At the start of the proceedings, I announced, “Tonight, lads, any trouble, and it’s not a yellow card. It’s a straight red as the eyes of Dundee are watching, hoping for a rammy! We also had a dancing girl and Gary Robertson, the Dundee street poet, present. Yeah, I am aware of the chap. Did he write the Gangs of Dundee book? Aye, and he read out a Fleet poem I had written that was fantastic. But as I say the hard part of the night was turning people awa! So, as I say, 72 guys turned up and some of them were older than us, like leaders and had about eight years on us.

    Lochee Fleet Meeting

    I was the MC on the night, and of course, there were many legends and great stories and laughs from over the years. I would say one of the highlights of the night was that I read out the roll of honour for the guys who were no longer with us; 27 of them were gone, and that was in 2011. Anyway, this went a lot better than I expected, especially since it was close to the end of the night. I presented names like Dennis McMahon, also known as Dixie, because many in the Fleet only remembered their nicknames. As soon as I mentioned the first name, the place erupted in loud applause. Instead of quickly listing all the names, as I had initially planned, I then decided to pause after each one. This allowed the crowd to truly appreciate the tributes. These were old friends of mine, and I felt a shiver run down my neck. They were properly respected, and some of the founding members were there, which was very emotional.

    Moving onto the streets, I learned about the Dundee gangs and their reputations over the years. It was a gang culture that not many people covered, and as you mentioned earlier, there were different colours to identify themselves? I have seen some pictures of the jumpers. As well as the Fleet I was familiar with the Hilltown Huns and the Shams?

    Yeah, everyone had their own colours. There was the Mid, and the Shams, which was the Fintry Shamrock. We probably got on better with Shams than the others; but they had top guy in Dundee called Davie Young, who sadly just recently passed away. He had actually threatened to come down to the Fleet reunion and do a wee speech, he thought he was welcome [laughter]. So, I drew the short straw and was the one that was to head him off before he got there. There were bad vibes as he had stabbed one of the Fleet many years ago and done four years in jail for it. The boy that he stabbed, was due to come down to the reunion, but he didn’t show up till later, and Davie Young didn’t appear. I saw Davie a few weeks efter that and he said: ‘Gadger I’m sorry I didn’t make the reunion’ I said ‘Davie, you weren’t even invited!’ [laughter]. I mean that would have been a total risk, it wasn’t like a respect thing.

    The photo from the reunion still shows great style to this day.

    Yeah, well I think it might have been mentioned in Gary Robertson’s book as well but we had a motto of Smart and Neat.

    Lochee Fleet Reunion

    But we fought everyone, including even Celtic and Rangers fans. We also travelled a lot. There was a film out at this time A Clockwork Orange, if you recall it? We adopted that style for a while, the white sta-press, white shirt, and braces. We decided to go to Hibs with Dundee one day for a Scottish Cup tie. Unfortunately, during those times, there was a lot of violence involving razors and blades. When we got off the train in Edinburgh, we encountered a group of Jambos who were heading to Ayrshire for their own cup tie. This situation quickly escalated into chaos, with many of the Lochee boys getting injured by open razors a few with serious cuts and one lad whose finger is still fucked to this day. It was bizarre, and we hadn’t even reached Easter Road yet. The ’70s were wild times, as things were often out of control, and the police seemed unaware or unprepared for it all. You could take crates of beer into the match, and fans could mingle on the terraces, standing right next to the away fans. There wasn’t any segregation at that time, but a few years later, the police made an effort to create a buffer with a thin line of officers. We would always meet at Samuels corner in Dundee city centre on a Saturday and there would be about 200 of us waiting on the football special coming in. Rangers always came at us with numbers, they were a game lot back then.

    I had a great conversation with Jim Cameron last year about the terrace styles of the ’70s. He mentioned the Boot Boys gangs and the Skinheads of that time, who were quite different from the later bonehead look. Did you share a similar vibe?

    Yeah definitely, I would call it suedehead much the same era, Crombie’s were a big thing, sta-press and docs were always worn. We moved onto the doc shoes as they were a bit smarter. There was a Prince of Wales check crombie and also the black one or a dark navy and both could have wee red hankerchiefs in the top pocket. I always liked the fact there was a tailor up the road there ‘Jackson’s & Burton’s who done our suits made to measure. Aye, Jim talked about the tailors shops as well. Aye, and a lot of thought went into this suit; it was made to measure. We discussed details like whether to include a pleat or a double pleat and opted for six buttons up the sleeves. The tailors were fantastic with us. Sometimes, around eight of us would take the bus to the tailor’s shop, and we could pay for our suits in instalments. The tailors would ask, “Ah yer fae Lochee? … there was one of your lot in earlier and he got this done with three buttons” he would show us and help us through the process [laughter]. The clientele varied between high-end businessmen and young working-class stylists, with nothing in between. Regardless, the tailors treated us brilliantly. There were also made-to-measure cardigans and brouges that were very popular. These days, people go online to order their threads, and I always think proper thought went into it back then. There was a shoe we wore, also called Springers, and they were much like a brouge. They had a plain front and leather soles with segs; we used to put extra segs on them, as many as we could sometimes. I still wear Gabicci. It’s a good label at a decent price. I have a favourite green one that I like to wear to Celtic matches.

    1,2,3, who are we, we are the boys who rule Dundee, with an F and an L and a double EE, T – Lochee Fleet rule all Dundee!

    The Lochee Reunion VIP invite requests the dress code to be ‘smart and neat’. Coincidentally, the VIP invitation picture features my first flat in the top left corner of Lochee High Street, my first ever flat [laughter]. Steve Martin, the ex-director at Dens Park, sponsored us that night. His company, R&M Bearings, is featured on the back of the invite in the same red and blue colors, so everything fell into place, well, it was fate, I think.

    Lochee Fleet Reunion invite

    “We are always smart and neat… If you see us in the street, you’ll get down and kiss our feet. We are always Smart and Neat!!”

    A while ago, I made Lochee Fleet polo shirts sporting an LF motif and Stevie Martin had asked if I could get him a new one as he had put on a bit of weight. The LF had double meaning with Luca Flynn, my grandson, and the Lochee Fleet. I had stopped doing them, but Stevie wanted one again. I think I will need to get some more made. I thought this was was class that Stevie wanted another one.

    How is your community work, especially in mental health awareness, going these days? I know this subject is very important to you.

    Yeah, well, I lost my son, as we know, Young Gadger, on January 7th 2017. He was only 34 years old, and that significantly impacted our lives. At his funeral, I gave a speech—not during the service, but at the Logie Club. Towards the end, I said, “If you ask someone how they are, be sure to listen to their answer. People often say ‘I’m okay,’ but it’s important to ask again, or to ask, ‘Are you really okay?’ After all, you might end up saving someone’s life.” So, later on into the night of the wake when the drink was going down, I had three of young Gary’s mates approach me and say, “Gary can I meet you next week? I’m struggling”. Three individuals were particularly brave, and there were possibly another ten behind them who never came forward. Since then, I’ve met seven or eight people, including one girl, all of whom had attempted to end their lives at some point. One of them was brought to me by their father for a conversation. It’s important to note that these individuals come from various backgrounds and are not exclusively from disadvantaged areas or schemes; their circumstances differ widely. I’m pleased to report that they are all still with us today. While I don’t consider myself a saviour, I was able to offer them a glimpse of the devastation left behind when someone chooses to end their lives. Families are left with a hole in their hearts that they can never fully recover from. A young boy came in with his dad, and it felt like his dad had forced him into the situation. I wasn’t aware this would happen; the boy likely wouldn’t have come to speak to me if he had known. His dad simply said, “I will leave you with Gadger,” and I didn’t like how it was done, the lad had no idea and it was like he had been hijacked. The boy started crying, and he was a big unit o a lad. Nevertheless, I worked to put him at ease, and it turned out he had attempted to take his own life just two days prior. However, I’m pleased to say that he is doing really well now. I saw him in toon a couple o years ago with his girlfriend, and I think he was scared I would come over to check on him. But I had nae intention o doing that. If he wants to talk, that’s perfectly fine, but those conversations will always remain just between him and me. I mean, I wouldn’t even tell my wife the names o these folk. I had one girl and she’s doing really well also and so I like to think I am getting support through to these people, they feel there is no way out, but there is.

    I am looking at taking up a part-time job, perhaps about 18 hours a week. This is called “Distress Brief intervention”, which helps in the community. Many people feel uncomfortable with the traditional image of a doctor in a white coat holding a clipboard, which may cause them to freeze or feel anxious. Therefore, my approach would be different. I would focus on encouraging them to engage in physical activities alongside talking therapies, take them places even up to the football grounds, anything to break the cycle. As I mentioned earlier, when people ask how you are, the typical response is “fine,” and everyone just moves on. It’s like a standard question with a standard answer. However, I recently read something in February’s GQ magazine where Danny Dyer expressed a similar viewpoint. I had made this observation about eight years ago. Danny Dyer, who has faced his own issues, echoed the same sentiment. It is important to ask and then ask again.

    During the lockdown, I was also doing personal training, which included a lot of boxing and pad work. While working on the pads, many of the guys would start to open up and share their thoughts, which was great. We often did this pad work outdoors, even in the snow, and it was an amazing experience. After our sessions, I would suggest going for a coffee. I met a big lad running around Lochee Park who appeared to be troubled; something just didn’t look right with him. I asked him if he was okay, and he immediately opened up to me. He had messed up at university, fallen out with his family, who were ashamed of him, and had been involved in a fight the previous weekend. I told him that he needed help, and spent 45 minutes with him. I asked if he would be interested in joining a boxing club. He used to attend SkyAxe Boxing Club, so I called the coach, and he mentioned that the lad had gone off the rails. I said, “Well, let’s help him get back on rails!” We managed to bring him back to the club, and now things are going well. I’ve always had a passion for helping others in this way, regardless.

    I have to say the mental health problems is very common mate. One of the toughest things after losing Young Gadger, is if I am out having a drink was that his mates would wait until the alcohol had kicked in, and they would approach me, and they would break down in front of me. It was because of the alcohol, I would see it coming, they would start to approach me in twos, and they’d say how they were missing Gadger, they would start greeting. However, as the years have went on I won’t break down with them now, sometimes it can’t be helped but it was dain me nae guid whatsoever. Dinnae get me wrong, they were saying good things. They would tell me stories about how Gadger helped them at the school when they were getting bullied, and I heard it many times, it must have been about seven or eight times, lads getting bullied at St John’s high school and he helped them, and that breaks ma hert! Lads I didn’t even know, would tell me how Gadger saved them. Things like lads trying to take money from other kids at dinner time and Gadger stopping it and telling them, “That stops now!”. I feel proud about that. So, I said to young Luca, who went to the same school but has since left. I said to him to do the same, and someone’s grandad approached me about his granddaughter being bullied, and Luca nipped it in the bud, and that’s what he did, and he basically replicated what young Gadge did. I mean bullies are liberty takers!

    You were a junior football manager for a while do you still have your hand in?

    Not so much now, I still go to see Lochee United or North End JFC. I was general manager at Lochee United as well. I was Ray McKinnon’s boss. Raymond was good. It’s hard to go and watch them if Celtic are playing on the same day. I like to go to Celtic Park. I suppose I do keep my hand in but I have kinda grown oot o it now. The players are a lot younger, so it’s their Dad’s (my ex-players) who are watching their sons. I have had some great times though, over 17 years. I was doing the amateur teams as well, I was manager at Broughty Athletic Juniors, then I went to Downfield and North End. I was five years at North End, I had some great times and met some great people. I always remember going down to Kilbirnie in Ayrshire in the Scottish Cup. It was all calm and quiet before the match, I read the team out and did a wee team talk, so I went outside for a coffee and the Kilbirnie manager was out there, a guy called George Walker. He was also the junior Scotland manager at the time. He asked how I was, and I asked him, “I thought you would have come up and run the rule over us and all that”? As it was the latter stage of the Cup. He then informs me, “Naw, I got all that info from a Dundee manager” who spilt the beans on us. It just so happened that the reporter called me for a low down on the game when on the coach going home, then I let him know about the conversation and I said “aye that so n so, gave the run doon on ma formation n awe that” and the reporter went and printed it on the Monday’s paper! But the certain person did phone me up and apologise. Also, I asked George if he expected a decent crowd on this day of the match, and he told me, “they are all over the back of that hill drinking Buckfast at the moment but you will be impressed, you’ll see them for the second half”. I thought this was odd, then I kinda forgot aboot it. Then 10 minutes into the second half, they all came over the hill like Comanche warriors, loads of them, I thought “oh my god”, they were singing, drunk, they had horns blowing. I didn’t know what to think next. But it became apparent they were just enjoying themselves. They made a great atmosphere. Then I couldn’t stop watching them when I was supposed to be concentrating on the match, it was bizarre! Kilbirnie beat us 2-1 on this day by scoring a late injury-time winner, it was the last kick of the game, a free-kick into the box. They launch the ball into the box and our keeper, ex Dundee United player Andy Stewart, shouted “Away!!” but oor centre half Lee (God rest his soul) thought he shouted “Andy’s!” so he ducks and this big player called Sinkie (who the fans had been chanting his name all day) does a flying header to score to make it 2-1.

    Another place we visited in Ayrshire was Ardeer. We won this game, and it was always courtesy to have a drink with the managers afterwards. So this chap was a decent guy and I couldn’t help saying that the facilities looked poor, I asked “what yiz dain here?” we got talking more I told him I was a Celtic fan and I had been reading a book about conspiracies called “Anyone but Celtic” and he told me, “Well I can vouch for that book to be factual, I know because I played 148 games for Celtic”. It turned out this chap was goalkeeper Evan Williams, who recently passed away. He took the managers job just to keep his hand in as he was passionate about football, he was such a nice guy.

    When I was manager at North End JFC, I actually fell out with Tommy Burns. I bet no many folk could say that [laughter]. We played Celtic Youths. Jim McInally was the manager, and they had Simon Ferry and Rocco Quinn playing. We beat Celtic 5-0, but it was no way a 5-0 match; we were just extremely lucky. Celtic destroyed us in open play. The difference on the night was the goalkeepers. We had ex Dundee United keeper Andy Stewart and Celtic had young lad who was letting in some soft goals. After the match Jim McInally kept his team locked in the dressing room which seemed like an eternity, he didn’t join me for a drink upstairs after it, which was fine. A few weeks later, we are going to Seville. We were going on the Club 67 flight with the celebrities such as Billy Connelly, and awe that. So, I sees Tommy Burns and a few of the other boys. I went over to him and thanked him for bringing his team up to play us a few weeks back. Tommy then said, “You lot! You kicked our boys off the park, Jimmy McInally told me!”. This was all a bit bizarre and not true. So I denied this. I could see in the distance young Gadger and few other Lochee lads looking over at me speaking to Tommy Burns, probably being impressed but unknown to them we were in an argument. Tommy said, “We’ll get all the big guns up and have a go at you”, I replied well, “you dae that then, arrange it now!” [laughter]. I mean, looking back, he’s only protecting his laddies, same as me. You could say it wasn’t like him but there you go. I would never hold it against him. Young Gadger and my wife were at his funeral, and we recently went to see his life story at the Kings Theatre, Glasgow, his wife was there. But he’s a class act, I just wish I could have spoken with him away from Glasgow airport.

    How are you feeling about Celtic and the current team at the moment?

    Well, yes! I am liking it. I go to most games, I have my season ticket. Sometimes the Lochee No. 1 doesn’t get enough heads to take a bus through, so we just jump on the train. I really liked the Ange years, I must admit. He came over on his own, I mean, I think he was asked if he was bringing any other coaching staff, and it was “No! just myself” a laid back Australian guy and his wee stick and hankie, “what’s happening guys?” [laughs]. I mean, Eddie Howe was meant to be coming with seven coaches before Ange, but couldn’t get all his backroom staff to agree! I loved Ange’s style and he brought in these Japanese players I took to them right away, Koyogo, Hatate and Maeda. You had Maeda with a fantastic work rate and pace but his finishing was sometimes off. But look at him now, I think perhaps Brendan Rodgers has got the best out of him. Here’s another question: who do you prefer out of Brendan Rodgers and Ange? … Now that is tricky, it took me a while to get over Rodgers leaving the first time roond. But he has made his mark, it wasn’t working out really to begin with, and I thought it might be a case of the famous saying to “never go back”, but he started bringing in his own system and he built on it. Now you look at us competing in the Champions League, I was at all the home games and you can see we are hard to beat. So he must take a pat on the back. I really like Carter Vickers at the back, he sometimes does the work of about three players. The best one is when he’s on his own against four Rangers players going forward. I saw a caption online saying: “Mon then al take the lot of yeez” [laughter]. It was a goal all day long but he saves the day. Cal Mac has been outstanding, he could do one-two’s in a phonebox. Maeda could be our main striker now, he plays that position for Japan.

    Gadger and the well-known owner of Celts Well pub in Santa Ponsa

    Have you been going to Celtic most of your life?

    Well, as much as I could. But when we lost Young Gadger the season ticket was gone oot the hoose and I had to go on the waiting list to get it back. It was always kinda about him as well. But I have renewed, and he has an inscribed stone on the Celtic Way which the guys from the Lochee No. 1 kindly put in place at Celtic Park. So, I feel blessed to go to Celtic Park, I feel he is there. It’s like a focal point for a lot of folk. Sometimes when the fans sing “walk on”, that gives me a lump in the throat.

    So, what was your favourite Celtic team?

    I was lucky over the years; I got to see some of the Lisbon Lions, the likes of Jinky, and onto the Quality Street Gang later on such as Dalglish. I like the players who wore the number 7. Henrik Larsson as well. I actually share the same birthday as Henrik, although I have 12 years on him. I remember we went to Santa Ponsa for my 60th, I spoke with big Rab Douglas who lives in the Dundee area and is also Peter Marr’s ex DFC Directors son-in-law before we left and asked if he could get Henrik to call me on the 20th of September and the both of us could have said Happy Birthday to each other whilst sitting with the Bhoys in Santa Ponsa. I was in my ain wee world [laughter]. Rab said “Never mind YOU! he wouldn’t call me”. That was brilliant from Rab [laughter].

    Last year, we attended the Celtic Player of the Year awards. Henrik Larsson, Chris Sutton, and Martin O’Neill were all there. When Henrik attempted to address the audience, he struggled to get his words out because the crowd was singing, “You are my Larsson.” You could see tears running down his face on the big screen.

    Martin O’Neil done a Q&A at the Dundee Rep, and it happened to be on my birthday. At the end of the event, there were only about eight people left in the theatre, including my wife and me. I decided to wait for him so we could get a photo together. I mentioned to him that it was my birthday and, coincidentally, also Henrik’s birthday. He seemed impressed and wished me a happy birthday. We started chatting, and I asked the bouncer to take a photo of us. I got Martin to make the Lochee Fleet sign, explaining that it was for Lochee No.1. My wife walked away embarrassed. There were a few young lads hanging around, and one shouted, “Oi, Martin, that’s the Lochee Fleet sign!” To which he replied, “Am I going to get in trouble?” I said no! I told the young guy to shut up! So, he eventually does it cautiously, it’s a wee bit limp [laughter].

    A few months later, he returned to Dundee, and I asked him to sign the photo that had “Lochee Fleet” written on it. He loved it. To address your earlier question, I would say that the Martin O’Neill era was one of the best; it was a turning point for Celtic, marking their resurgence.

    I must mention a Neil Lennon story, a quite bizarre one, I have met Neil twice, once at Hampden when we had a chat about Simon Ferry, so I got a photo with him. I had it on my phone and didn’t think anything of it. I then took a job with an oil and gas company. Everything was going okay but they brought this new guy into the company who was a bluenose. I got on okay with him to start with then he started bringing in a few of his mates, which did concern me. The new manager wanted to do a team building pub crawl thing when we were working up in Aberdeen. We were in the Soul Bar in Union Street, everything was going okay on the night oot, then I get’s a text message and the picture on the phone is myself and Lennon. The next thing this manager tries to actually spit on my phone. I challenged him asking what are ye awe aboot! and he says, “dinnae tell me yer a Celtic sympathiser?” which is something I’ve never heard before. Then announces, “A hate that Lennon”. From then on we didn’t really speak, then about two weeks later I was made redundant from the company. I went straight up to his office and told him what he was, namely a bigot and he wouldn’t look me in the eye. The next time I met Neil Lennon he was doing a Q&A up here in Dundee and I told him the story. I said, “Neil, I lost a a guid job because of a photo!” he asked “a photo of who?” I said, “me and you” we were laughing about it.

    Do you see much of the Celtic lads from Glasgow these days?

    I still keep in touch with them. I often see Big Cookie and Jason Higgins at the matches. Young Gadger used to hang out with them, and we shared many memorable days together. I’ll never forget that just under a year after losing Young Gadger, I received a text from Jason. He was at Malone’s in Sauchiehall Lane in Glasgow with Cookie and invited me to join them. Coincidentally, Frank McGarvey was doing a Q&A session that day. It was a Saturday morning before the match, and my wife and I were still feeling a bit raw from our loss, but it turned out to be a good icebreaker. During his talk, McGarvey (God rest him) mentioned “my old pal Mo Johnstone.” and someone shouts “he’s a cunt” and McGarvey is trying to justify it by saying he was still my team mate at the time. After the Q&A McGarvey is straight over to us to find out who shouted it, but he knew it was Jason [laughter], but he ended up drinking with us, Jason introduces us to him, and we got a few photos. As the day goes on, Big Cookie comes over to inform us, “Gadger, I think Frank fancies yer Mrs” [laughter]. I told Frank I would “knock him oot”; it was all a bit of a laugh though. I mean we were still grieving we still had a lot going through our heads but it was funny how humour with all this nonsense in Malone’s can alleviate things. We got a taxi up to Celtic Park and we thought, “How good was that?” It was all off the cuff, and it helped us. I really admired Jason and Big Cookie for that.

    Is it correct to say you were what was called a Lochee Fleet personal trainer?

    Ah, that was when I trained a lot of folk one-to-one, like I mentioned earlier. I had a laddie from Dundee United and Luca that I used to train together. They were about 13 or 14 at the time. They were both very committed, and we used to train in all weathers, snow, rain, sleet and freezing temperature’s. I didn’t have the indoor facility, so it was up at Lochee Park. I got a buzz out of it, and they did too. The young guy from United is now on loan at Stirling Albion but at the time he was getting verbally abused at school and stuff. This knocked his confidence. We practiced various ball control skills, running with medicine balls, and boxing training with Luca’s help.

    We then went down to a place in Broughty Ferry after lockdown, it was a classy hotel called the Woodlands wi a top gym. So, we walked in and the lassie at the desk tells us, “the gym is for elite athletes only” to which I replied, “they are elite” as I looked at these two young scally wags. I got them in but the lassie was still arguing. Since then, the two of them have represented Scotland, the footballer has played for both under 17s and under 19s while Luca has fought 14 times for Scotland. I have a good mind to go back down to the hotel now and show them both aff.

    Tell us about you and the wife’s visit to Madison Square Gardens?

    Yeah, it was ma wife’s 50th and Joe Calzaghe was having his last fight with Roy Jones junior and the Mrs agreed to go there. So, we were in a hotel, I think it was thirty-fifth street in Manhattan. So, I put a kilt on with a t-shirt that said, “Calzaghe’s tartan army” now, I have been told a few times I look like Calzaghe, so as we were going tae oor seats there was an American film crew there who thought I was related to the boxer. They kept hounding me and asking me for an interview. Then there’s a group of Welsh fans who spot this and start singing “super Joe” tae-words me! The sweat was lashing down the back of my neck. I mean there was folk like Danny DeVito and Evander Holyfield an awe that standing right beside us but they were mair interested in me. I’m now trying tae tell them, “am nae relation” but they’re saying, “you must be man! are you his brother?” I keep denying it and eventually we get to our seats and I’ve never been so glad to sit doon. So, the next thing is, when we are now getting settled a guy rocks up with one ae they see you Jimmy wigs and a kilt, and shouts oot, “is that you Gadger?” and my wife says, “a dinnae believe this, no in the middle ae Madison Square gardens” It was a an old pal fae Lochee who had been living in Edinburgh for a few years. He had saw me getting awe this attention and said. “actually you do look like Joe Calzaghe … I’ve just realised that after everyone shouting at ye!

    And your two grandsons are a credit to you, both doing well?

    I’m very proud, mate! My oldest grandson, Aidan, will be 25 this year. He is outstanding, and his knowledge of football is second to none. While he’s a Dundee United fan, it could be worse (laughter). When he was born, he had an issue with his foot, and the surgeon told us he wouldn’t be able to play football at any decent level. However, he ended up playing for Dundee schoolboys and even scored the first goal for the team, proving them wrong!

    Then there’s Luca, who played for his Primary and Secondary school football teams. He also had a year at Dundee FC and played ice hockey, roller hockey, and the guitar. Now, he’s a champion boxer. He trains hard with tough endurance sessions. Out of his last 29 fights for Lochee BC he has won 24. At Ravenscraig he has won 11 and out of his last 12 fights, so Ravenscraig is brilliant for him.

    Luca is a machine, though! He comes from a boxing loving family, and I’ve met some fantastic people through the sport since he took it up. I’ve gotten to know Alex Arthur really well; he’s invited me to visit him in Edinburgh. He has a gym above a row of shops on Rose Street, and he has a son the same age as Luca named Machlan who is also a very talented boxer. I also got along well with Ken Buchanan (God rest his soul). I must mention Brad Welsh as well, whom you knew too. What a great guy he was; I appreciated his community work and coaching.

    Music and Albums?

    I liked a variety of music over the years. Bowie, The Beatles, The Clash, Queen and Texas. I mean Bowie, in particular, reinvented himself many times throughout his career.. That Ziggy Stardust album cover when he’s on the cobble stones in London is legendary. I am also a fan of Oasis and their front cover of Morning Glory is on Berwick Street in London. I love that type of thing, class, simple but very effective and iconic.

    I also enjoyed Northern Soul music, and the Fleet boys often took a bus to Wigan but I was usually playing football and missed the all nighter trips, that is a wee regret looking back. I love The Jam and Paul Weller, and Young Gadger felt the same way. One of the last gigs I attended was by Sharleen Spiteri, who performed at a small pub in Dundee called The Church. It was an intimate event with about two hundred attendees, and her voice was outstanding; I believe it was the best singing voice I had ever heard.

    After the gig, a crowd began to gather outside the pub as Sharleen had photos taken with the fans. I decided to get a picture with her too. We had a great craic about Celtic, and I told her about my grandson, Luca. She said she would keep an eye out for his results.

    So how’s life now for Gadger Strachan?

    I’ve definitely mellowed over the years. I remember the first few years after losing Young Gadger; I had no anger and wasn’t fazed by anything. Nothing seemed like a big issue. Even when a car cut me off, I would just shrug it off. I suppose others might have reacted differently and gone down the wrong path. Now, I’m more relaxed, even in the way I dress. While I still wear Lacoste and Fred Perry, I’ve started to wear more comfortable sportswear in my later years such as Nike, Under Armour and new style by Steve Robb ex DFC and DUFC player called Bee Inspired.

    My daughter Yvonne (45) and Luca five times National Champion

    I’m still in touch with my lifelong friends from Lochee: Ricky, Flynny, Stewarty, Dek, and John, as well as the travelling around with the boxing scene. The great people and coaches from Lochee ABC especially the Howett family; also the Kean family at SkyAxe Boxing and all my ex players and Coaches from over the 17 years as a Manager who still keep in touch with me, and there are many.

    I enjoy going to Celtic Park, and my holidays help keep me going. We have a holiday to Benidorm this May with 20 guys from Lochee going for five nights.

    Thanks for having us mate.

    My pleasure. God Bless.

  • Pints, dominoes and dogs

    26th January 2025

    The Unicorn pub sits proudly at the heart of the scheme in Penicuik, on the east coast of Scotland, run by Raymond and Murial MacDougal. The pub is a neighbourhood spot with the spirit of a tight-knit community in the 1980s. After spending more than a year down south, I knew it was only right to return and reconnect with the familiar faces of the pub locals, curious to see how life had shifted in my absence. As I make my way up the five weathered steps leading to the heavy wooden door, I could hear the warm hum of conversation and cackled laughter mingling with the rhythmic clatter of dominoes played on the tables inside. As I step through the door, I feel a sense of nostalgia and anticipation for the stories and the latest banter that awaited me within those time-worn walls. This was a familiar reminder of the essence of the small towns of Caledonia, where the working class embodied resilience and strength, showing no signs of vulnerability. The first thing I observe is the row of men playing dominoes while an assortment of loyal dogs lie comfortably at their feet, their eyes half-closed in contentment. The room is enveloped with that blue haze of smoke, which is more pronounced as sunlight streams through the windows. I suppose I wasn’t truly ready to embrace any changes. I always feel a kind of warmth when things have stood the test of time. The bar is filled with genuinely warm and friendly men who create an inviting atmosphere. However, amid the laughter and camaraderie, there are also some idiotic and ecccentric characters.

    The Laughing Cavalier is an interesting character; there he is, standing at the bar giving his exaggerated tales, then bursting into laughter that mimics a machine gun. His stories often lose clarity, but you await his laughter, and he appears to enjoy his funny stories more than anyone else. However, his laughter is undeniably contagious, making it impossible for me not to join in, even if it’s at his expense; it’s a twisted joy that comes from laughing at him rather than with him. I would always encourage him to start a story so he could get to the sound of “KA KA KA KA KA KA KA KA!!” others in the bar would just stare at him with lashings of disdain in the hope of discouraging him. Raymond is serving behind the bar with a smile as he looks around, making it appear to be a fun place to be while he collects coins for the Pale Ale and Bells Whisky. The Cavalier, in his vibrant, flamboyant attire, is giving out teasing jokes to the regulars about their appearance. His gaze has fallen upon James Boland, a man in his thirties with a receding hairline: “Oi James,” the Cavalier began, tilting his head as he gestured with mock innocence, “I see yer hair’s getting a bit wavey at the back?” all eyes on James as he processed the playful jibe. He replied with an intrigued yet wry scowl that suggested a blend of amusement and mild exasperation. The Cavalier springs into action, shouting, “Waving goodbye!! KA KA KA KA KA KA KA!” As predicted, a group of us gathered at the bar is bursting into fits of infectious laughter, which only encourages the Cavaliar to continue his rapid-fire bullet hilarity.

    At the other side of the bar, sitting at his usual table, is Auld Dougie, who is a true pub legend, a familiar figure who bounced in each Saturday, his trusty transistor radio clamped to his ear like a lifeline to the football world. With an enthusiastic shout, he unleashed the latest scores and sensational game updates, turning the pub into a hub of electric energy. While the TV bar flashed the scores behind him, Dougie thrived on the spotlight, relishing the thrill of sharing juicy snippets of information. In those moments, he felt every bit as vital as the air traffic controller guiding planes to safety, commanding the attention of everyone around him. He always bore a striking resemblance to a character from Harry Enfield’s show—an insufferably self-righteous old chap whose catchphrases “only me!” and “you didn’t wanna do that” echoed in my mind. Clad in a tartan flat cap that sat jauntily atop his head and light, casual golfing attire, he was a familiar sight. Dougie took immense pride in declaring himself a “right Scottish fitba man,” relishing the chance to catch a good game, regardless of which teams were competing. He professed to have no particular allegiance; his only loyalty lay with the love of fitba itself, a true neutral who embraced the sport in all its glory. As time passed, we began to pick up on Dougie’s expressions, the subtle changes in his mood as he clutched the radio to his ear, eagerly anticipating updates. The bar’s regulars often called out to him, eager to know the latest scores from each match.

    This particular Saturday afternoon, Celtic are playing Aberdeen away up at Pitoddrie. This match seems to interest him the most for shouting out little snippets. “Celteek’s up against it!” he exclaims in his high-pitched, squeaky tone each time Aberdeen presses forward. With a hint of mild excitement in his voice, he announces, “Penalty to Aberdeen!” drawing the attention of some of the delighted locals. He then proceeds, “That’s 1-0 to Aberdeen!” The room responds with a wave of cheers and animated chatter from familiar faces. For the next quarter-hour, a hush fell over the bar as most of the punters returned to their dominoes, pints, and animated chat. As I look at the TV behind the bar I see the update: Aberdeen 1 Celtic 2. However, no updates were heard from Dougie’s table just radio transistor silence. Turning my attention to Dougie, I can’t help but notice the look on his face, which bore a striking resemblance to a trout caught helplessly in a swirling torrent whirlpool of despair. It was clear that Auld Dougie had been caught off guard, this result was nae guid for Scottish fitba!

    Auld Yellow Ears saunters into the bar, the fabric of his long, worn jacket trailing slightly behind him while his flat cap sat snugly atop his head. Eddie was his real name but the locals christened him “yellow ears” due to decades of puffing Regal King Size – his ears, teeth, and some of his fingers had literally turned yellow. In fact, he was well on the way to transforming into a cast member from “The Simpsons”. Auld Yellow hailed from Manchester. What made him particularly intriguing was his unusual allegiance to both Manchester United and Manchester City. I always believed this was so he could pander to both sets of fans to see what he could gain. He is always looking to make a quick buck and if he wasn’t in the pub his second place of worship was the bookmakers. It was hard to ignore the signs of a classic gambling addict. When he wasn’t nursing a pint at the bar, he was huddled with the locals, concocting bets over everything from game outcomes to the toss of a coin.

    The tune reverberating from the jukebox is “Live is Life” by Opus. An assortment of the pub are rhythmically stamping their feet and joyfully slapping their laps in unison to the chorus of “Live (na-na-na-na-na) … “Live is life (na-na-na-na-na).” It would not be a normal Saturday at the Unicorn without the lighthearted revelry, educated opinions, often fueled by a few too many pints, leading to spirited debates and finally a bit of confrontation. As I look towards the end of the Bar next to the window, Auld Yellow Ears and the Laughing Cavalier seem to be engrossed in a lively and eccentric contest. This strange game involves predicting the colour of the next car that will drive by the pub. The stakes, a mere 50 pence, their faces animated with the thrill of the gamble. I would imagine this is ignited by the clever mischief of Yellow Ears. As they savour the taste of beer and rum, the atmosphere grows more animated. It quickly becomes apparent that the Cavalier is on a winning streak, raking in 50 pence for each accurate guess about the shade of the passing vehicles meanwhile, Auld Yellow, on the other hand, seems to be trapped in a whirlpool of misfortune. At that moment, the Cavalier catches sight of Yellow Ears fizzing with rage, which prompts a fit of uncontrollable laughter from the Cavalier. His laughter bursts forth in a series of rapid-fire cackles, “KA KA KA KA KA KA KA KA! “Are ye trying a rip me off, ye bastit?” Yellow snarled, as he grabs his throat. With a powerful shove, they both crash against the table, sending pints glasses clattering to the ground as they tumbled onto the floor in a tangle of limbs. Murial, from behind the Bar with her eyes flashing with exasperation, seized the ice cube bucket and hurled it over them, a cascade of cold cubes spilling out like confetti as she scolded, “Ya pair of fackin arseholes!” Her voice rang out, a mix of frustration and disbelief, as she asserted her authority amidst the chaos.

    That’s entertainment!