It’s been a while so let’s see what’s been IN and OUT this week. Feel free to message in any extras. Remember, it’s only a lark and not to be taken seriously.
IN:
Coxy on Radio Two
Pickled Onion — Golden Wonder
Necking a whole box of Go Ahead bars coz it says so
SEVVIE’s having meltdowns on Clyde Super Scoreboard.
Getting back into clubbing that finishes before midnight
Serg trackie tops for the summer
Fizzy water
Sobriety
It Started in the North Shop
Pinky out espresso drinking
Keep the Heid Club
Keep the Heid Club members
Arm wrestling yer cat
The Brannigan Crisp lorry driver
Doing the school run dressed as an Afghan Hound
Priya Sharma from Emmerdale
Shouting out: “er she/he is though!” to everyone entering the workplace.
Speaking through yer nose on a conference call.
The all-time greats.
Having a Cirry oan
David Holmes
Brothers Jo’s Sonic Treasure
Cold Water Exposure
Big Ange
The Return of Dance Craze
Professor Yaffle from Bagpuss
Heaton wearing Adi Trekker Jacket
Weatherall’s 60th Tribute
99 red balloons full blast
Doing the pogo to Yeke Yeke with yer buddies
Asking folk if they want a beer or a thick ear!
Neuro Diversity
Johnny Marr being a Tim
Asking the Barman for a drink that awe the young yin’s drink these days.
Holywell Street Team
Self-development projects
Getting it right roon folk
Moving a chist ‘o’ drawers
OUT:
Jamie Redknapp and his Sketchers advert … because he does wear them n that
Sun out but still freezing
Folk walking about airports still wearing those neck pillows
Property selling programs Blasé blaz ‘we only have £600k to play with’ types of folk
Sitting on a train next to SEVVIE’s, Squaddies or Rugger Buggers
Mental Health Socks-up Psychiatrists
The cost of living
A t-shirt saying ‘I don’t need to google’ plastered over the front!
Song Lyric ‘The eye of the tiger, Cause I am a champion, and you’re gonna hear me rooaaaar!’
Song lyric: “I didn’t think I was hungry til I tasted you”
The price of a chippie
The quote: “everything happens for a reason” cosmic forces crap!
The words “Holliebobs” and “Amazeballs”
My hollibobs was amazeballs
A student cafe in Manchester named ‘Nom Nom’
Barry Ferguson adopting the SEVVIE supremacist outlook on life
January Joggers and January to March Gym Joiners
Last train whoppers
Last Bus whoppers
That’s that again for another week tho! It’s only a carry-on. Never let yer public down … spin them right round, like a record baby. Remember … mirror, signal, manoeuvre and on ye go. Switch everything off at night. Cheers now.
Holywell Street Towers is situated next to Celtic Park. Pop in and see us Monday to Friday or on a match day. Paul Kealy makes the best Jerk Chicken. Get Yersels roond.
Holywell Street has been catching up with Paul Gallagher, Liam’s and Noel’s older brother. Paul has been giving us his musical opinions, influences, and the bands he has worked with, as well as his DJ experiences. This is perfect for our football, Celtic, terrace scene, and counterculture section.
Thanks for chatting to HWS Paul, how’s things with you?
Hi yeah, all good. Just sitting in a freezer and avoiding the sunshine, amongst other things.
We believe you had a radio slot with Islington Radio. I tuned into Boogaloo Radio when you had a slot. It was an education getting to hear bands that had perhaps bypassed me. Do you still do radio?
Yeah, there are a few reasons why. In the past five years, there has been an influx of amazing music that deserves to be heard, and for whatever reason, the UK radio owners and beyond are obsessed with ignoring new music and sticking to the old acts. Now, whether that is to do with demographics bullshit or the probability that they – the labels and publishers want another return on the music they have paid for years ago and are pretty happy to ignore the new stuff – which they won’t see a return on it? Everything comes down to free money with rich folk. So I will play it!
How would you describe your musical upbringing, and did you influence your younger siblings with that?
Like most of my mates in Manchester, we grew up in an Irish house. My father was an Irish Country and western DJ, so the music was everywhere. When you hang out with your mates, you hear different sounds and then find your own path.
You are doing a photography these days as well, I believe?
Yeah, I think I’m in the most creative part of my life just now. I have no idea how things worked out, but they did. I just follow what I like and yeah, I do a few things to keep alive.
We are aware of your DJing career—it appears you travel to obscure places. What music do you play?
It has been a bit of a roller-coaster. I am with Liam now and do his pre-shows, which differ from playing in a club, so you have to adapt to whatever you’re at. Thankfully, it has been great.
What would you say was the best band you signed when looking back?
I didn’t sign many bands they were mostly publishing within Creation Records but I can name them – Own Lady Owner, Wireless, Super J Lounge.
This could be tricky … your favourite five albums of all time are? …
I am not an album guy per se, but if I’m pushed …
Odessa – Bee Gees
Universal Hall – The Waterboys
Sound Affects – The Jam
The Specials – The Specials
Pure Comedy – Father John Misty
Do you think Man City will retain the league, is there a period of domination for them?
Is this a trick question … of course, YES and YES
Apart from the fact City are the best team in England do you miss the old ground and area instead of to the corporate structure?
I suppose we all need to move on. If we were still at Maine Road, we wouldn’t have what we have now?
You and the brothers are also Celtic fans. Do you still make it to many games? I know you came up in the ’90s, even when things were not so great.
Yes. I came up to many games. But I am done with all football stadia these days so the last game was Porto in 2021 Champions league final.
You were given a Celtic mug as a kid, did it all start from there?
Yeah, and of course we’re an Irish family also it’s a big thing innit?
What would your most memorable Celtic team?
Any team Jimmy Johnstone played in, I just remember seeing footage of him racing down the wing.
What do you think of Kyogo at Celtic?
Yes, he’s tops. Let’s see what he does this season. They have to do it all again; second is no good in Glasgow.
Do you and the family get over to visit Ireland as much?
Yeah, my mother has a house there and I get back when I can.
What bands are you listening to just now – do you still try and get to as many gigs to check out new bands?
I listen to a variety of genres. I can’t possibly name just one, two, or even 10.
Are there any bands you would like to promote?
There are far too many great acts out there right now to single them all out, but, in the UK in 2022 then … Joe unkown, Holy Youth Movement, Noisy. In the USA it’s even harder but … Jaialai, Nick Leng, Kevin Morby, FJM , Nathaniel Rateliff, Curtis Harding, Anderson East, Gregory Porter. In Europe … The Liminanas.
HWS wishes to pay tribute to a beloved brother and sister who have both passed away. These two siblings, cherished family friends, brought joy and warmth to our lives. Their vibrant spirits and enduring bond will always be remembered in our hearts. Donna and Dusty Miller were avid Celtic supporters who enjoyed their bowling hobby. The siblings thrived on the bowling green, showcasing impressive skill and camaraderie, but their talents did not stop there; they were also good football players. Donna, blazed a trail in the sport during the 1980s, a time when few girls even considered stepping onto the field. Her determination and prowess in a male-dominated arena not only challenged societal norms but she could be considered the original football lass. She could also deal with any conflict that came her way. Donna got me employment beside her in a mill factory in the late ’80s. Renowned for her mischievous spirit, she took great delight in playing pranks and teasing her coworkers. One particular afternoon, a male colleague, confident in his punk persona with its colorful hair and leather jacket, attempted to undermine Donna’s spirit. He thought his edgy appearance and rebellious attitude would intimidate her, but little did he know how strong-willed she truly was. As the punk took a swing at her, she grabbed his arm, twisted it, and threw him to the ground.
Dusty was a genuinely good soul, his face often adorned with a warm, permanent smile that lit up the room. His eyes sparkled with warmth and affection, revealing how much he cherished those around him. When he spoke, it was with a rapid-fire enthusiasm that matched his personality, making every conversation. He was truly a force of energy. We would discuss Celtic in less than a minute and analyse the upcoming games. A few months ago, I spotted Dusty as I was driving down the street. I couldn’t help but smile, so I tooted my horn, drawing his attention. As our eyes met, we just pointed at each other, sharing a brief, nostalgic moment before I continued on my way.
Donna and Dusty were dear family friends who held a special place in our hearts. This tribute is dedicated to their memory and the impact they had on our lives. We will always cherish them, yours and Celtic’s, always.
That’s that, Like it, love it, report it, skip it!
HWS towers is located at 95 Holywell Street next to Celtic Park. Come along and see us. Bring awe yer mates. Paul Kealy cooks excellent Jerk Chicken free of charge.
Turkey Hair and Turkey Teeth with an all inclusive
Joy Division – Insight, full blast on iTunes.
Having auld pals called Elspeth and Airchie.
Twix Extra!
Paisley and Mac Jacket!
Friday feeling!
Birds singing.
Lois Navy Cords.
Adidas Athens
Buzzing off yourself in the mirror!
Gardening in the nak!
Rummaging around the attic and finding the original copy of the bible
Reading the bible in the bath.
Those Bounty Biscuits.
The meaning of rife!
Edwyn Collins singing L.O.V.E. love
Showaddy- without the –waddy
ITV showing XTC on ecstasy on BBC
Finding a tic tac on the bus
Filling all your ma’s shoes with mashed potato
Doing the school run dressed as an Afghan Hound
Fascists getting a bop on the nose.
Chicken Fried Rice!
CSC past and present.
Saying ‘thang’
Twatting anyone who says ‘bants’
Cameron Diaz as of when required.
Aff the sauce.
Aqua one day – Daks the next!
Swaggering doing the Liam walk into the Petrol station.
Celtic fans singing Grace!
Helping the homeless!
Helping old lady’s called Muriel across the road.
Holywell Street Towers
OUT:
The cost of living.
Grant Snapps
Gary Barlow.
People blaming the ‘winny works’ for today’s society problems.
Depression stigma number 300 ‘eat fruit’ by I’m alright Jack!
Getting diagnosed with sleep apnea; but refusing to wear the Darth Vader mask.
The Daily Mail.
The whole of the Tory cabinet.
Standing in dog toffee.
Walking into cobwebs face first!!
Getting 3 hours kip.
People who don’t know the difference between ‘There’ ‘They’re and ‘Their’
Trying to open a bag of Granola!!
Dickheads in Town who kick off after a stripe
The ‘My life is so perfect’ crowd on Facebook!
Nazi Hipsters.
Mental Health socks-up Psychiatrists
Black Mutt following.
Burn out!
Lonsdale footwear!
The neighbour shouting ‘gan Aldo!’ When yer hitting yer punch bag in the back garden!
Celtic fans demanding 5-0 results every week!
Saying ‘thingio an that ‘
Eating tic tacs on the bus
Ice Ice Baby!
Massive Beards, bellies, man buns, shit clobber!
Socks for fish.
Come and visit at Holywell Street and meet the team, bring awe yer mates.
*HWS Towers is situated at 95 Holywell Street, next to Celtic Park (see above) get yersel roond.Paul Kealy cooks Jerk Chicken at the office to perfection.
The Unicorn pub sits proudly at the heart of the scheme in Penicuik, on the east coast of Scotland, run by Raymond and Murial MacDougal. The pub is a neighbourhood spot with the spirit of a tight-knit community in the 1980s. After spending more than a year down south, I knew it was only right to return and reconnect with the familiar faces of the pub locals, curious to see how life had shifted in my absence. As I make my way up the five weathered steps leading to the heavy wooden door, I could hear the warm hum of conversation and cackled laughter mingling with the rhythmic clatter of dominoes played on the tables inside. As I step through the door, I feel a sense of nostalgia and anticipation for the stories and the latest banter that awaited me within those time-worn walls. This was a familiar reminder of the essence of the small towns of Caledonia, where the working class embodied resilience and strength, showing no signs of vulnerability. The first thing I observe is the row of men playing dominoes while an assortment of loyal dogs lie comfortably at their feet, their eyes half-closed in contentment. The room is enveloped with that blue haze of smoke, which is more pronounced as sunlight streams through the windows. I suppose I wasn’t truly ready to embrace any changes. I always feel a kind of warmth when things have stood the test of time. The bar is filled with genuinely warm and friendly men who create an inviting atmosphere. However, amid the laughter and camaraderie, there are also some idiotic and ecccentric characters.
The Laughing Cavalier is an interesting character; there he is, standing at the bar giving his exaggerated tales, then bursting into laughter that mimics a machine gun. His stories often lose clarity, but you await his laughter, and he appears to enjoy his funny stories more than anyone else. However, his laughter is undeniably contagious, making it impossible for me not to join in, even if it’s at his expense; it’s a twisted joy that comes from laughing at him rather than with him. I would always encourage him to start a story so he could get to the sound of “KA KA KA KA KA KA KA KA!!” others in the bar would just stare at him with lashings of disdain in the hope of discouraging him. Raymond is serving behind the bar with a smile as he looks around, making it appear to be a fun place to be while he collects coins for the Pale Ale and Bells Whisky. The Cavalier, in his vibrant, flamboyant attire, is giving out teasing jokes to the regulars about their appearance. His gaze has fallen upon James Boland, a man in his thirties with a receding hairline: “Oi James,” the Cavalier began, tilting his head as he gestured with mock innocence, “I see yer hair’s getting a bit wavey at the back?” all eyes on James as he processed the playful jibe. He replied with an intrigued yet wry scowl that suggested a blend of amusement and mild exasperation. The Cavalier springs into action, shouting, “Waving goodbye!! KA KA KA KA KA KA KA!” As predicted, a group of us gathered at the bar is bursting into fits of infectious laughter, which only encourages the Cavaliar to continue his rapid-fire bullet hilarity.
At the other side of the bar, sitting at his usual table, is Auld Dougie, who is a true pub legend, a familiar figure who bounced in each Saturday, his trusty transistor radio clamped to his ear like a lifeline to the football world. With an enthusiastic shout, he unleashed the latest scores and sensational game updates, turning the pub into a hub of electric energy. While the TV bar flashed the scores behind him, Dougie thrived on the spotlight, relishing the thrill of sharing juicy snippets of information. In those moments, he felt every bit as vital as the air traffic controller guiding planes to safety, commanding the attention of everyone around him. He always bore a striking resemblance to a character from Harry Enfield’s show—an insufferably self-righteous old chap whose catchphrases “only me!” and “you didn’t wanna do that” echoed in my mind. Clad in a tartan flat cap that sat jauntily atop his head and light, casual golfing attire, he was a familiar sight. Dougie took immense pride in declaring himself a “right Scottish fitba man,” relishing the chance to catch a good game, regardless of which teams were competing. He professed to have no particular allegiance; his only loyalty lay with the love of fitba itself, a true neutral who embraced the sport in all its glory. As time passed, we began to pick up on Dougie’s expressions, the subtle changes in his mood as he clutched the radio to his ear, eagerly anticipating updates. The bar’s regulars often called out to him, eager to know the latest scores from each match.
This particular Saturday afternoon, Celtic are playing Aberdeen away up at Pitoddrie. This match seems to interest him the most for shouting out little snippets. “Celteek’s up against it!” he exclaims in his high-pitched, squeaky tone each time Aberdeen presses forward. With a hint of mild excitement in his voice, he announces, “Penalty to Aberdeen!” drawing the attention of some of the delighted locals. He then proceeds, “That’s 1-0 to Aberdeen!” The room responds with a wave of cheers and animated chatter from familiar faces. For the next quarter-hour, a hush fell over the bar as most of the punters returned to their dominoes, pints, and animated chat. As I look at the TV behind the bar I see the update: Aberdeen 1 Celtic 2. However, no updates were heard from Dougie’s table just radio transistor silence. Turning my attention to Dougie, I can’t help but notice the look on his face, which bore a striking resemblance to a trout caught helplessly in a swirling torrent whirlpool of despair. It was clear that Auld Dougie had been caught off guard, this result was nae guid for Scottish fitba!
Auld Yellow Ears saunters into the bar, the fabric of his long, worn jacket trailing slightly behind him while his flat cap sat snugly atop his head. Eddie was his real name but the locals christened him “yellow ears” due to decades of puffing Regal King Size – his ears, teeth, and some of his fingers had literally turned yellow. In fact, he was well on the way to transforming into a cast member from “The Simpsons”. Auld Yellow hailed from Manchester. What made him particularly intriguing was his unusual allegiance to both Manchester United and Manchester City. I always believed this was so he could pander to both sets of fans to see what he could gain. He is always looking to make a quick buck and if he wasn’t in the pub his second place of worship was the bookmakers. It was hard to ignore the signs of a classic gambling addict. When he wasn’t nursing a pint at the bar, he was huddled with the locals, concocting bets over everything from game outcomes to the toss of a coin.
The tune reverberating from the jukebox is “Live is Life” by Opus. An assortment of the pub are rhythmically stamping their feet and joyfully slapping their laps in unison to the chorus of “Live (na-na-na-na-na) … “Live is life (na-na-na-na-na).” It would not be a normal Saturday at the Unicorn without the lighthearted revelry, educated opinions, often fueled by a few too many pints, leading to spirited debates and finally a bit of confrontation. As I look towards the end of the Bar next to the window, Auld Yellow Ears and the Laughing Cavalier seem to be engrossed in a lively and eccentric contest. This strange game involves predicting the colour of the next car that will drive by the pub. The stakes, a mere 50 pence, their faces animated with the thrill of the gamble. I would imagine this is ignited by the clever mischief of Yellow Ears. As they savour the taste of beer and rum, the atmosphere grows more animated. It quickly becomes apparent that the Cavalier is on a winning streak, raking in 50 pence for each accurate guess about the shade of the passing vehicles meanwhile, Auld Yellow, on the other hand, seems to be trapped in a whirlpool of misfortune. At that moment, the Cavalier catches sight of Yellow Ears fizzing with rage, which prompts a fit of uncontrollable laughter from the Cavalier. His laughter bursts forth in a series of rapid-fire cackles, “KA KA KA KA KA KA KA KA! “Are ye trying a rip me off, ye bastit?” Yellow snarled, as he grabs his throat. With a powerful shove, they both crash against the table, sending pints glasses clattering to the ground as they tumbled onto the floor in a tangle of limbs. Murial, from behind the Bar with her eyes flashing with exasperation, seized the ice cube bucket and hurled it over them, a cascade of cold cubes spilling out like confetti as she scolded, “Ya pair of fackin arseholes!” Her voice rang out, a mix of frustration and disbelief, as she asserted her authority amidst the chaos.
HWS has finally had the opportunity to read Magnetic a tribute to the late Massimo Osti and his renowned clothing labels: C.P. Company, Boneville, and Stone Island. These prestigious Italian brands need no introduction. The book explores the evolution of these labels as they rose to prominence in the UK from the mid-eighties to the early nineties. I have had the pleasure of knowing Tony Rivers for quite some time, and he has co-authored this insightful work alongside James Burnett.
As the book illustrates, the story is not a tribute to the paninaro scene or the football terraces; rather, it explores how various labels began to establish themselves in the UK, even with celebrities and musicians. Regarding the football terrace scene, I have always maintained that the concept of ‘casuals’ was on the decline, perhaps as early as 1989, before these labels gained widespread popularity. While I did observe elements of it in the ’80s, it became more prominent later on and into the ’90s, particularly within the club scene. I am glad this book considers this assessment to be fairly accurate as well. I also remember Stone Island being much more affordable in the early days and certainly of better quality.
The photos in the book complement its authenticity. They primarily consist of old Kodak pictures that effectively capture the era. The stories are also genuine, as significant effort was made to track down the highly sought-after labels of Massimo Osti. The proper independent retailers are where you were prepared to travel in search of the latest CP Company or Stone Island. The book narrates the story of a young man from Portsmouth who travels to London early in the morning to pick up some new clothes, hoping to return in time for their home match against Charlton. Upon arriving at Waterloo Station, he notices that the Charlton lads are already early and about to make their way to Portsmouth, prompting him to call ahead to his Portsmouth lads. This illustrates the lengths youths would go in pursuit of these threads.
It is an educational document that shares stories from connoisseurs and, more intriguingly, explores shops from a time before online shopping. These shops had a personal touch where people would gather and become familiar with the staff and owners. One amusing story involves the shop Woodies in Cardiff, which had three red Stone Island duffle coats in stock. Two of them were quickly purchased by Tony, the co-author, and a rival lad from Swansea. The third coat was bought by the England goalkeeper at the time, David James. There are debates about which shops in London stocked the labels first. I can recall visiting Woodhouse and Jones in Covent Garden in the early ’90s, and it appears they may well have been the first.
In our opinion, the Osti labels have always had a certain mystique, particularly in their early years. This document helps fill in many of the gaps regarding their history. In addition to those with their roots in working-class backgrounds and football terraces and the club scene, several musicians also embraced these labels, including Nick Heyward, who contributes his own section. Other notable admirers of the labels include Johnny Marr. As mentioned earlier, the old photos some unseen until now, contribute to its authenticity. These include Dermo from Northside and Tim Dorney from Flowered Up wearing the labels. It is very pleasing to see a good tribute and article from Graham ‘Kerso’ Kerr included as well.
The HWS team has been eagerly anticipating this essential coffee table addition, and we believe the wait of two and a half years has certainly been worthwhile. Hats off!
*If you would like to purchase a copy of MAGNETIC, please e-mail magnetic990@gmail.com, providing your full name and address.
Holywell Street recently connected with Eddie Clarke at McChuills Bar in Glasgow, as we often do. Eddie has been a friend of our team for quite some time; he’s a great guy with a deep love of music and Celtic. He is a former member of the Decadent Movement and has produced some excellent tracks. More recently, he has been working on screenplays, including one titled “Backdater,” which we look forward to seeing.
Starting with the band the Decadent Movement, which we rated highly, I would also say they were an underrated band. How did the band come about?
Well, the band started during the lockdown period with me, Paul Byrne from the Quadrofenians, and a few guys in recovery. We had a friend named Jazz who had a home studio, so it all came together quite well. I am a songwriter, and I don’t feel I am so confident at singing, but I have recorded songs. I wrote a track named “Glasgow’s Burning.”
I wanted to mention “Glasgow’s Burning,” which is one of the best tracks I’ve heard. It truly captures the city’s essence, and I love the lyric, “She’s like an east-end sky.” It tells a story for me.
Glasgow’s Burning
Yeah, I agree. Paul would send me a guitar tune and ask me to add lyrics, which I find comes naturally to me. The track was written during the lockdown when we couldn’t go to Glasgow, and I had so many thoughts swirling in my head. It felt natural to express those thoughts; during that time, we experienced a surge of creativity, but we couldn’t act on it. The theme of the track reflects the contradictions within the city itself. You can turn a corner and encounter a completely different vibe depending on the area. One moment, you might be in an affluent neighbourhood; the next, you could find yourself in a less prosperous one. The opening line, “She’s a dirty old city, but she’s a work of art!” encapsulates that sentiment perfectly.
If we go back before the bands, were you also into the clubbing scene?
Absolutely! I originally came from Saltcoats, where we had the Metro. Hanger 13 was also along the coast. We would go clubbing and raving from Thursday to Sunday nights. There was a chill-out club in Clydebank on Sunday nights, but I can’t remember its name. We visited it most weekends in the ’90s. I loved those times; Saltcoats was a very different town back then. There were raves right on our doorstep, and busloads of people would arrive in town, making it bustling every weekend. The town and the pubs became very vibrant during that time.
Were you going to Celtic matches at the same time or before all this?
Aye, very much so! I have a long journey with Celtic, as I grew up following them. My dad actually signed with the club on the same day as Lou Macari; both joined from St. Michaels in Kilwinning around 1966. They were part of the team during the era of the Lisbon Lions and contributed to what became known as the Quality Street Kids. My dad was signed by Jock Stein, but unfortunately, he was only at the club for a couple of years because he broke his leg. After that, he moved down to Cambridge. He then ended up with Kilmarnock and Morton. His nickname was”Bootsy,” he used to go to the football pitches in Salcoates with his boots wrapped around his neck. .
Being able to say you were signed by Stein is something not many folk could say?
Aye very true. My dad was obsessed with football; it was his life. I inherited that passion and started playing at a very young age. I was heavily influenced by my uncle Eddie and, of course, my cousin Stevie, who is now the Scotland manager. I played for a few teams and was very decent but much like yourself I was taken in by going to Celtic Park and crowd watching, looking at certain styles and of course the terrace tribes. Then the ’90s came along and the product on the pitch wasn’t ideal so that kinda justified that. But these things never leave you.
Thinking about other bands that have Celtic links, we were talking about it the other day on the birthday of Celtic …
Aye, yesterday was Celtic’s birthday, and I also thought of “The Wakes” and that piece about the Barrowlands. The song “Glasgow Cross” captures the essence of Celtic with the line “romance was born under an East End sky,” which reflects our creative spirit. Another example is “Acid Ultras and the Lost Subcultures Found.” I believe Celtic embodies that romance, just like the pub we are in right now.
The Wakes
What was your first Celtic game?
That would be the 1985 Cup Final against Dundee United, where we won 2-1. I was with my Dad, Uncle Eddie and my cousin Michael. That was a superb final, and these things never leave you. … Aye, a Frank McGarvey diving curling header; I always wondered how he managed that. We were in the main stand that day, I actually wrote a poem about it called the “first cup is the deepest”.
I particularly loved the Centenary season in ’88 and the match we clinched the league against Dundee at Celtic Park. I think there were about 100,000 in the ground that day, with fans standing on the tracks. Just after that came the barren years, of course, and that’s when I was going to the games myself. But I still loved it.
How do you feel about the present team? Are you going to many matches?
I currently share a season ticket, and I’m delighted with the direction the team is heading. I wanted Brendan Rodgers to return and was open to the idea. I was obviously gutted when Ang left, but if Rodgers was willing to come back, I welcomed the opportunity, especially since he could have chosen to go elsewhere.
How did you feel last season when our performance dropped and it looked like we could lose the league?
It was frustrating at certain games. We had this kind of Jekyll and Hyde thing where it was a game of two halves. The first half was good, but we would fall away in the second half. I never enjoyed many of the matches, but it was special when we went on to clinch the league. We came good in the end. That game at Ibrox 3-3 was a brilliant result for us, but Rangers celebrated it as a win as they had equalised in the last minute. But you can see now what BR was doing that season; it was like a transition and building. Then you can see that that team had evolved into his team this season and pre-season. Aye, and I think he has got the best out of certain players now? Aye, and that includes Koyogo and even more so Maeda, he has improved them.
In discussing your band’s journey and recovery, it’s important to note that yours took a different path compared to many others. Your band members were already in recovery, while artists like Paul Weller and Bobby Gillespie became sober later in their careers. They have also stated that they find their most creative work often occurs during their recovery period.
Aye, I have met many people who have come into recovery and were into music or starting out, and they seem terrified of losing their creative streak as they believe their work came from when they were using or drinking. It just takes a bit of adapting and the creativity is very much still there.
Yeah, although it’s interesting that Shane McGowan maintained that if it weren’t for alcohol, he wouldn’t have produced his genius. To each their own, I suppose. He continued to drink until we lost his genius last year …
Absolutely! That’s where he got his material, from pubs and alcohol. However, it seems he never tried to go without them. As for me, even though I loved music and bands, I didn’t join one until later in life, despite my passion for writing lyrics. The other band members Sean and Paul had been part of various groups for years before that. So, when I was in recovery, I spent six months in rehab and went to meetings. During this time, I had a sponsor. He was a musician with an incredible house filled with guitars, drums, recording equipment, and pianos. He took me under his wing and was the first person I ever showed my lyrics to; I hadn’t shared them with anyone before. I was starting to improve my writing and gain general confidence. One day, while we were walking through Glasgow, we passed a Cash Converters, and he went and came out with an acoustic guitar. He told me to put chords to the lyrics I had written. At that time, I was living in sheltered accommodation, and I felt that this moment was a turning point for me; that’s how my journey began. From then on, I realised that music and lyrics became my therapy. I now feel equipped to put my thoughts on paper for my well-being, especially since my mind can sometimes race at 100 miles per hour.
I must touch on the Recovery Connect Festival, is that something you still do?
Aye, definitely and we have had some excellent bands there and good connections. There is a great wee band going about at the moment called Local Authority from Ayrshire, who supported the Libertines last week at the Barrowlands, Gary and the band are cool guys. We initially had them playing at the Recovery Connect Festival. I tend to look for newer bands as much as I can. But yeah, the Recovery Connect has been a great thing. I spoke with Alan Mcgee this morning. We have a yearly event at Queens Park Southside. It has been going on for six years. It’s not so much for everyone in recovery, but it’s an option for people to come along and listen to music without the need for alcohol and substances. There is a lot that actually happens within the walls of recovery but its not really highlighted anywhere. Perhaps it doesn’t sell well due to what a sponsor could bring to it. So, Alan Mcgee has been good for us he introduced us to the Shambolics from Kirkcaldy and we had them playing also he got us John Power from Cast last year. We were told this morning that we have three years of funding for the festival, which is good news. I mean, it is all about getting people involved; although it is about music, it also gets people out and about again.
I always need to throw this one in. Can you give us your top five trainers?
Ok here we go …
1) Adidas Munchen
2) AD X Clark’s Samba’s
3) Saucony Shadow 5000
4) Adidas Handball Spezial
5) Novesta Star Master Mono
And the best band of all time is?
I would need to say the Stone Roses at a push; they were a massive influence.
Finally can you tell us about the short movie you are involved with, which is called Backdater?
I am currently making a short film called ‘The Backdater’ set in Saltcoats. The film will follow two days in the life of a pair of local characters caught in addiction (Gydo and Spammy) after Spammy has won big from the DWP in the form of a hefty backdated payment. The film will explore the complexities of addiction, intergenerational trauma through Adverse Childhood Experiences and the power of friendship in a rural community. The film is set in Saltcoats in the mid-nineties when the town had a vibrant nightlife due to the dance scene sweeping the country at the time. Saltcoats was a hotspot due to the success of the Metropolis nightclub. Unfortunately, along with the dance scene came an influx of drug use, which had an adverse effect on the town.
Sounds good mate and we look forward to that. Thanks for dropping by, Eddie; it has been a pleasure.
No worries, mate.
Thanks to Nick at McChuills for looking after us and Derek Monaghan for his input and photos.
Recently, HWS met up with Eddie Clarke at McChuills Bar in Glasgow. During our conversation, we discussed his five favourite and most influential albums of all time. As you can imagine, this topic was quite challenging and deserving of a separate article. Now, let’s hear from Eddie.
I don’t think I could ever choose my top 5 BEST albums, so I’ve went for my top 5 most influential albums. The thing with music is it’s very much based on my perception at the time and my mood for it to resonate with me.
Being born in the mid ’70s, I was far too young to remember a lot of the music around at that time, but my first introduction to what the youth were listening to then were the words ‘The Jam’ spray painted on the side of a house just down from me in my scheme. It must have been the early to mid-eighties. I remember squads of youths dressed as ‘Mods’ and remember thinking that they were cool as fuck. They stood out from the average lads at the time and they seemed to take great pride in their appearance. I admired the haircuts, the Fred Perrys and the parkas. It was a style, that even today, I still lean to.
No. 1 – The Stone Roses – The Stone Roses
But at 10 years old, I was still too young to show much interest in the actual music. It wasn’t until 1989 that I actually got my first real introduction to something that would grab my attention musically, and it blew my mind. My older brother came home with a tape of a band Called ‘The Stone Roses’, and it was to become somewhat the soundtrack to my youth, and beyond. I instantly became obsessed.
When I first heard the opening track ‘I Wanna Be Adored’ all the way to track 11, the final tune on the album, ‘I Am The Resurrection’, I was totally gripped. Even at 13 years old the sound gave me a glimpse of the effect music can have on your mood and lift you out of the shit. This opened up the door for lads my age to be part of what would be known as Indie/baggy/Madchester scene. Baggy jeans were purchased, hair was grown in the style of lead singer Ian Brown, and long-sleeved t-shirts were the uniform for the foreseeable. We had arrived.
‘Don’t waste your words I don’t need anything from you I don’t care where you’ve been Or what you plan to do’
I Am The Resurrection
No. 2 – HAPPY MONDAYS – BUMMED
The revelation of The Stone Roses self-titled album opened a door for me into the already developed Manchester music scene at the time. Under-age nights were now being held in nightclubs all around and along with the dance music were indie tunes remixed with heavy bass lines such as The Stones Roses masterpiece ‘Fools Gold’ along with thee stand out song for me from this album ‘Wrote For Luck’. This was my first introduction to The Happy Mondays and Shaun Ryder. Although a very different sound to The Roses, Shaun Ryders vocals were raw with a punky vibe which resonated with the rebelliousness which we were all part of at the time. right on cue, Thrills’Pills’and Bellyaches would arrive along with the types of drugs that would make it sound epic.
‘And I wrote for luck They sent me you And I sent for juice You give me poison’
Wrote For Luck
No.3 – DEFINITELY MAYBE – OASIS
1994, 18 years old and feeling like I could take on the world Oasis arrived on the scene with what might well be one of the greatest debut albums of all time. The timing was perfect for me and this album just said everything in music that me and my mates couldn’t ever put together in words. It was a ‘Fuck you, we’ll take it from here’ statement and each track seemed to be better than the other. ‘SuperSonic’ ‘Cigarettes and Alcohol’ and ‘Live Forever’ total anthems that would be screamed at the tops of our voices in every boozer we’d frequent.
Oasis had arrived and taken clean over from the void left by The Stone Roses over that period (Although they did release The Second Coming later on that same year). It felt like we were absolutely spoiled for great guitar bands back then compared to the shite we’re subjected to nowadays. I don’t think there’s been a band since Oasis who’ve represented the working class so accurately.
One of the biggest attractions to the band themselves for myself was also their openness about their Irish background and their love for Irish rebel music, with Noel quoting –
“I feel as Irish as the next person. The first music I was ever exposed to was the rebel songs the bands used to sing in the Irish club in Manchester. Do you know, I think that’s where Oasis songs get their punch-the-air quality – from me being exposed to those rousing rebel songs. It was all rebel songs and that godawful Irish country and western music”
No.4 – THE VELVET UNDERGROUND AND NICO
This album is a bit out of place alongside my first 3 album choices but definitely had a significant effect on what I love about variants of musical tastes. Again, I was total obsessed from the day I heard this album and Lou Reeds influence mesmerised me from the first listen, along with Nico’s haunting vocals on ‘Sunday Morning’ and ‘Femme Fatale’.
The Velvet Underground released this album in the same year that the Lions won the European cup so the album release date is always etched on my brain. Not only is it an incredibly unique and varied listen, but it defines Lou Reed and the velvets to their core. It’s rough, there’s songs about substance use, there’s songs where the production was influenced by substance use, it’s edgy, revolutionary, fucked up and I just couldn’t and still haven’t stopped listening.
‘I don’t know just where I’m going But I’m gonna try for the kingdom, if I can ‘Cause it makes me feel like I’m a man When I put a spike into my vien And I tell you things aren’t quite the same’
Heroin
No.5 – ‘ALL MOD CONS’ – THE JAM
From way back in the mid-eighties when I seen ‘The Jam’ spray-painted on the side of a house not far from where I lived, it took me another 10-15 years before I really listened to their music. Noel Gallagher had recently released an acoustic cover from this album called ‘To Be Someone’ and it was outstanding. Noel’s cover took me to check which album the track was from and it was The Jams 1978 album ‘All Mod Cons’, which included timeless masterpieces like ‘Down In The Tune Station At Midnight’, ‘A Bomb In Wardour Street’ and ‘David Watts’. I’m sure this album would have been the voice of the working class at the time and had as much of an impact as to what The Stone Roses and Oasis had on me at my coming of age. Again, an album that I regularly revisit and I feel is a reflection of The Jam in their prime.
‘To be someone must be a wonderful thing, A famous footballer, a rock singer Or a big film star Yes, I think that I would like, I would like that’
To Be Someone
Thanks to Nick at McChuills for looking after us and Derek Monaghan for his input and photos.
The Dumfries Bowling Club bar is a place Shaun McSorley and I would hang around in during the midweek days. It became a beacon of solitude during those days spent in a dole induced coma in the hope just to numb the pain of mind-boggling sadness of knowing we were mere puppets on Thatcher’s strings. The mid 80’s brought along many things and most of it was yet another toe punt in the balls. Fae communities being torn apart at will along with family members being pitted against one another on the picket line. And those once proud heart beating industries of the area that once gave people where I’m from a sense of identity were discarded to the ash heaps of history. Along with our hopes of a brighter tomorrow. Such painful thoughts we couldn’t escape whilst watching horizontal rain rattling off the boozer’s windows. Deep down the pair of us had visions of escaping abroad to live in the sun. Sure, more than likely we would still be jobless and penniless. Still at least we would be in a land where the sunrises.
The usual suspects in the bar during the week are, Whiskey Nose McCulloch, Bruce Campbell, and Arch Thompson. They were undoubtedly the most significant trio of bitter, bullying old twats you could ever encounter. While their antics were often cringe-worthy, you could either sit back and observe them with a healthy dose of disdain, or you could find yourself giggling at them uncontrollably or cringing at their behaviour.
Whiskey nose rightfully earned his title due to his big read cricket ball hooter as a result of his daily battles with Bell’s whiskey. A boy who could easily be handpicked by Santa to guide his sleigh in a Christmas Eve snowstorm. He had a real resemblance to Sid James and consistently wore the same black shirt with small silver tassels on the collar, it reminded me of something that Johnny Cash would wear. Along with this he would just growl at us.
The three stooges were avid supporters of Rangers FC. Just another reason that left me wondering why the fuck I shared the same airspace as these jokers. Of course, they would refer to them as ‘the fucking Rangers’’. Words that sounded like that angry self entitled persona that most of this clubs faithful carried around like the pounds and pence in their pockets.
Bruce as always is kitted out in his customary Adidas samba training shoes, snow wash pieces of denim, and a brown leather jacket with big flaps. Also prominent was his tight, curly hair, which was almost pubic-like, sporting a big brown moustache and silver-rimmed specs. Lager top is his choice of drink preferably McEwan’s. He seemed to like that wee bit of froth on his moustache so he could lick it off. The year is 1987 and Rangers were sponsored by McEwans Lager. Also on the go was the McEwan’s Lager advert ‘’you’ve got the power’ by the band ‘Win’, this instilled into Bruce something that he could never find on his own, a sense of belonging.
Arch Thompson was the angriest of the three, a boy who would probably moan if the sky was blue. His round football-shaped face is a ringer for Korky the Cat from the Dandy. The sort of puss that would fast become addictive smashing.
The three amigos were constantly trying to get us barred from the bowling club as we were “not of the correct calibre to own a membership to a respected establishment” This of course made things less boring which was a bit of a bonus in the grand scheme of things. Shaun’s crucifix necklace seems to attract special attention from Arch, he addresses him as “the cunt wi the hang glider”
On this particular depressing wet and tedious afternoon, myself and Shaun are in the club drawing picture’s and crushing beer mats while downing snake bites. Simple measures to prevent us from running a razor across our wrists. Our sketches were at least creative including a music group consisting of Arch fitba face Thompson and his entourage. In the name of comedy the band was named “The Firemen” as oppose to “The Police” ironically because at this very moment the jukebox is playing Walking on the Moon and Arch is miming the words with his comrade Whisky Nose whilst they are playing dominos.
The cartoon drawings have Arch Thompson on vocals as he has the loudest and aggressive persona, a bit like John Lydon, but not in any good or talented way. Rudolph’s love child was strumming the bass guitar, giving it pure attitude. We then illustrated Bruce Campbell giving it big bashes on the drums. A tag along who was quite harmless was auld Dougie, he’s also a regular in the bar. Dougie rarely found himself away from his transistor radio in his lug, as he listened to the football scores or horse racing. All with the purpose of trying to score a rare victory over the bookie. We scribbled him into the band and sketched him just standing there tapping a tambourine. Auld Dougie’s dress code is always a dead ringer for that Harry Enfield character with the catchphrase, “Now I do not believe you wanted to do that, did you?”
Arch ‘Korky’ Thomson is at the bar ordering his drinks when we hear the rustle of a crisp packet, and he’s staring straight over at us, all macho with his chest puffed out, whilst shaking his pack of ready salted crisps. The next thing, Raymond the bartender has a pickled egg on a tablespoon and proceeds to drop it into Arch’s packet of crisps. Arch then gives the packet another gentle shake as he’s still staring straight through us with this ‘square go now then ya cunt’’ expression melted across his puss. It reminds me of one of John Waynes western flicks where he’s waiting for the first cunt to blink before he lights up the room like a Fourth of July firework display.
Incidentally, this pickled egg and crisps mix is his lunch he is telling Raymond and it saves him from “going hame for dinner, it is a balanced meal I’ll tell ye, and I sometimes add peanuts for the full of nutrition”.
As we’re drawing and imaging Arch signing in a band the laughter almost becomes contagious. As old fitba face is munching on the crisps he gives us the obligatory fantasy threat yet again, “you lot are no so clever when I see you in Fine Fare and you go white wi fear especially the cunt wi the hang glider!” This daydream grenade has been thrown into our laps many times. So, once again Shaun and I need to inform him and and more importantly for the benefit of the audience that “we have never seen you in Fine Fare”. To which we get the compulsory threat of “I’ll take the twae of yizootside”
Predictably, Raymond, the barman rolls over and attempts to defuse any potential tension. He informs us: “I don’t believe in mindless violence gents so can we all keep things civil, the club has a good reputation”. As he has both his hands out in a slow posture that mimicks bouncing two basketballs. Of course, he is only looking in our direction with this request. This will be due to his fear of Arch et al and with him also being a supporter of the Rangers I would strongly predict. Raymondo either wears a Scotland or a British Lions rugby shirt with the sleeves rolled up, and this would alternate each day. Today it was the red British Lions one. His head is always shaved to the bone and we are convinced he applies some kind of oil making it shine like a snooker ball.
Suddenly, Raymond is very impressed with our sketch. It is really Shaun’s handy work he did have natural talent and had flirted with going to art school in the past.
“That is talented drawing lads,” Raymondo compliments us, possibly this is a kind of deflection tactic. He is so impressed he inquires, “Would it be possible for the club to have the drawing, it’s not often we can show such creativity from our members” so, with Mr Sheen head having no idea who the characters were, we oblige and to this day the picture of a band named The Firemen hangs above the Bar at the Bowling Club; with only Shaun and myself knowing who the characters are.
Sitting away from the crowd were two distinguished gentlemen: Eric Boland and Professor Yaffle, both of whom had little fondness for Arch and his companions. Eric is genuinely a good soul, who, after a few beers, has a habit of crushing your hand and proclaiming, “I’ve just rode into town,” a phrase inspired by his love of Western movies. As always he is wearing his signature deerstalker hat. I believe the hat adds to his character; I loved how he would tie the ribbons under his chin while sipping his glass of whisky with his pinky raised. I suppose you could say Eric was a bit damaged or eccentric but it was never in a negative way for us.
According to legend, Eric was a well-known Rugby Union player who traveled to the north of England to play Rugby League, where he could earn maire than a cauliflower fur his troubles. His dream to aspire was viewed as a serious betrayal, leading to a disconnection from his peers in the Rugby Union community. Fitba Puss and Whisky Nose also criticised him for this choice, failing to resist peer pressure and the small town mentality. Having such ambitions is often viewed as an act ae class treason in such small towns.
Eric did not care and would inform us “see that lot at the bar, thir a waste o claes … Fackin arseholes”. Shaun and I could certainly relate to this.
Professor Yaffle is Eric’s right-hand man but he just sits there in silence but will laugh at Erics stories like some geriatric groupie with this “nyick nyick nyick” tone. This resulted in us baptising him “Professor Yaffle” in honour of the carved woodpecker from the ‘70s children’s programme Bagpuss. He also just so happened to wear those round lensed specs as well like John Lennon
Professor Yaffle’s full name on the programme is Augustus Barclay Yaffle. He typically prides himself on being the brains of the outfit, given his extensive knowledge. However, our version at the bowling club presents a more complex character who mostly agrees with Eric and the rest of us.
Augustus Barclay Yaffle
Eric would rhyme off stories and direct a sideways glance, swinging his thumb towards Yaffle for confirmation, “he’ll tell ye,” and Yaffle would respond with a toothy smile followed by his characteristic squawk. Shaun and I loved sitting there, enjoying the company of the two men and their crazy sense of humour. We could relate to it, perhaps out of boredom, but who cares?
Eric is sharing his daily anecdote, which has a cowboy western movie twist to it, as he mimics drawing a gun while riding into town. it, as he mimics drawing a gun while riding into town like fucking John Wayne himself.
“I rode into town and down the Old Kent Road and stopped for caviar and truffles”.
Our table of four is on that infectious laughter, in-the-moment vibe enhanced by Yaffle’s response. However, Korky the Cat puss Arch Thomson is glaring over holding this invisible wheelbarrow posture. Miserable prick was opposed to a laugh and giggle. The cunt was always self-conscious in case we were ripping the piss out of him and band of merry men.
As the pints were rapidly downed, Eric folded a beer mat into his mouth in the name of comedy and for the sheer thrill of making a tit of himself. His patter is drenched in a thick London twang and he belts out a repetitive rant…
Dan the Old Kent Rowd
Dan the Old Kent Rowd
Dan the Old Kent Rowd
This trip through the asylum has set us all off in to explode in a fit of giggles and watching the poker face response from Arch et.al only turned up the thermostat on the comedy routine. However, Raymondo, the barman with his snooker ball napper on full display is collecting empties and with his intense gaze in our direction we’ve clearly not tickled his funny bone. Arch fitba puss Thomson escapes the unravelling events and growls over to us, ‘IRA bastards!’’. The sickly odour of sectarianism is hoovering up everybody’s beaks. Such a bizarre accusation, leading Raymondo to seek out an escape hatch. He informs us ‘“okay lads it’s time to leave, we can’t have such political views here at the club” So due to our apparent political opinion’s reported and confirmed by the jury of Arch “fitba puss” Thomson and encouraged by whisky nose McCulloch we are being told to leave. By this point, none of us can even find the energy to argue. We are still too much in hilarity. As we leave the club and approach the exit, Raymond feels a sense of power and is guiding us towards the door walking behind us expertly herding us like a flock of sheep. Although we are leaving anyway and are care-free about the whole situation.
As we look back at the fine gentlemen of the Bowling Club establishment. We have whisky nose, Korky the Cat and Bruce frothy moustache singing in unison “cheerio, cheerio, cheerio”!
Holywell Street 